Page 34 of Julian's Curse

“Julian Valmont, my fiancée. He’d want to know that this happened.” I murmured.

The doctor gave me a weird glance and then asked me to fill out a contact form. It didn’t really make sense why I was asking the hospital to call him. But she didn’t question it.

Even though this involved Rose, I wouldn’t call Julian myself. It felt too penetrating to talk to him on the phone, too soon after everything. And I had lost all my empathy for his behavior. The way he’d treated her, the way he’d failed her, left me certain that whatever he’d done this time, it was serious. I could barely think of him without a surge of anger.

“Give it a few days, Lucie.” The doctor informed me. “But I’ll keep you posted as individual recovery can differ.”

I didn’t need to think about my next step. “I’ll stay around at the hospital then.” Rose didn’t have anybody there, so I’d be the one. I planned to call Sophie, to see if she could maybe grab me some clothes to change. Then I would live on the food from the vending machine if I could even eat anything at all. Amanda, she’d understand this was an emergency.

“Look, it may be best for you to just go home.” The doctor suggested kindly while taking a seat next to me. “Besides, I don’t know if you noticed but a few people have been looking at you here.”

I hadn’t. It was now the norm in my life that strangers felt compelled to snap photos of me. Where was Will anyway? He had to be around somewhere. That’s how Julian would eventually find out what had happened. I was about to protest the idea of going home when I realized her advice seemed entirely rational. My decision to stay was emotional and impractical.

“Rose is asleep now, she won’t even know you’re here,” the doctor continued. “We’ll call you once she wakes up. I promise.” She then handed me a tiny envelope. “Ambien, in case you need rest. I expect to have more news tomorrow, and you’d want to be awake then.”

As much as I didn’t want to leave Rose alone at the hospital, I also didn’t want to be the source of a sensation at a time when everything seemed daunting. And I assumed the hospital couldn’t provide me with a private space to wait. In the end, I had to agree with her.

“Thank you,” I motioned to leave, offering a tight-lipped smile before standing up to head back to my car. The first thing I planned to do when I got home was send Rose a room full of flowers to remind her that I was still there for her. Then, as the doctor suggested, I’d return.

Will reappeared, and without a word, we drove home.

I didn’t wantto talk to anyone by the time I got to our apartment. It felt eerily quiet, after our devastating exchange. I picked up the shattered pieces of the cup from the floor, hoping to erase the memory of our painful argument, and then treated myself to a hot chocolate. At least it gave me some sustenance without making me feel heavy in my already knotted stomach. Despite it being almost midnight, I wasn’t ready for sleep.

Although I appreciated the Ambien prescribed by Rose’s doctor, I decided against taking it, mainly to keep my clarity. Instead, I stared blankly into space, my thoughts swirling in all directions, unable to find any peace. The image of Julian with another woman filled my mind, and with it came a surge ofjealousy and aching pain. Was he, at this very moment, giving himself to someone else?

If that’s how he chose to handle our problems, then I’d have to find the strength to become the one girl he could never have again. With these images, I sat there, holding the warm mug of hot chocolate, watching the steam rise softly from the surface. My fingers traced the rim absentmindedly, hoping my thoughts would eventually lull me to sleep. A wishful thought anyway.

I was about to switch to a homemade screwdriver, ready to mix up something more potent, when my phone lit up with a message. A flicker of hope ignited in my chest because I expected it to be from either Sophie or Bradley—someone who might offer the comfort of friendship when I needed it most. But it wasn’t either of them.

I am sorry.Julian’s name flashed on my screen.

I exhaled slowly, feeling a sense of relief, like the pressure that had built up inside me was finally starting to ease. It seemed like he was beginning to understand my perspective. And in that moment, it hit me—he might have been struggling just as much as I had. But still, I couldn’t bring myself to reply right away; too much had happened, and I needed more time to hear him out and make sense of everything from his side.

I didn’t have to wait long for that.Lucie, you’re so pure. And I am struggling with ghosts.

Was he talking about his family?Julian, I have my ghosts too. I wrote back without acknowledging that I’d accepted his apology that soon. I needed to hear so much more than that to consider a reconciliation.

I went to Trading Yesterday and couldn’t help but think of our first time there. The day that I knew I wanted to marry you. He reminisced.

That was the first day I’d found out just how much of a public figure he was—and it came early in our relationship. It was alsothe day he’d given me my rose—the red rose he’d bought for me downtown. Then, to fulfill a childish wish of mine, he’d turned it into an eternal, glazed rose.

So, in the end, he hadn’t visited a private club like he’d said. He’d gone to his yacht, choosing to retreat in his own loneliness. The idea of him there, alone, made a strange ache form in my chest.

I remember carrying you to bed that night—the moment I knew I’d lose my mind if I didn’t have you right then.

No this wasn’t good. My body suddenly already felt hot with desire. I remembered it too. He’d taken my first time that day. But I still needed to remind him how much he’d hurt me earlier. The sting of the memory lingered.I guess it means you didn’t end up fucking any other girls after all?

It didn’t take long for an answer to arrive.I wanted you to feel pain because I couldn’t handle mine.

It was the raw truth, and I could accept the explanation. People dealt with perceived loss differently. But his reaction had been way more intense than ever before. He’d never used cruelty to get me to feel a certain way. I didn’t like this side of him.

You should come home, Julian. We should have been having this conversation in person anyway.

Lucie, first, I got to tell you something. It’s going to change everything between us.

I didn’t like the way this sounded.We’re only going to work if you are honest, remember?I was certain that I could handle whatever he’d say, though. What could he possibly say that would break us?

I am ashamed, because I need help.A new message arrived almost instantly.

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