Page 50 of Lust

“You keep giving me hell about it, but then expect me to share something this personal?”

“That’s a fair criticism,” Seth concedes. “I’ve been pressing you about that because you are so secretive. But we need to understand what you’re experiencing. It could help us make sense of what the hell is going on.”

I grunt. “I don’t like this.”

“Okay,” Cody says in a gentle way, like he knows Seth hit a nerve. “Brad, do you have anything you want to say about that?”

“Can you not talk to me like I’m one of your future clients?”

“I’m just trying to get to the bottom of this.”

It doesn’t make this shit any less weird. “It’s not the kind of thing I want to talk about. It’s embarrassing, and deeply personal. And then it’s not just me. I can’t speak for Luke—”

“We’re back to you putting him first,” Seth says.

“Seth, we’re listening now,” Cody presses, which makes Seth take a breath.

I go on. “What if I was probing you about things you could only share by also sharing things Cody might not want me to know?”

“Don’t play like you know this guy like I know Codes.”

“Seth, can you understand what he was trying to say?” Cody asks.

Seth considers the question. “I do, but my point stands: I don’t get why he’s being loyal to someone who hasn’t earned that.”

“I don’t feel like I’m being loyal as much as seeing Luke as another person who deserves consideration.”

Seth’s gaze meets mine, and his expression relaxes. “Okay. I hear that.”

About fucking time.

I take my first sip of Cody’s shake, cherishing the mix of ice cream and espresso—two of my favorite things. Between Seth actually fucking listening to me and the taste, my defenses are starting to come down.

“Okay,” Cody says. “Now that we’ve gotten all that out of the way, there’s more.”

“More?Fuck.”

Cody heads to his desk and takes out a spiral-bound notebook. He opens it as he approaches me, and I can see it’s notes about Luke’s vision.

“He mentioned a statue he thought might be a squirrel with a hat,” he says.

“I remember.”

“We think he got it wrong. The animal, at least. The mascot for the winter festival.”

“Bucktooth Beaver?” I’m surprised I didn’t make the connection from Luke’s description.

“We’ll have to check with Luke,” Seth says, “but you wouldn’t necessarily know the animal unless you’re familiar with Lawrenceville. The fair doesn’t open until November twenty-first, so we think another murder will take place after the twenty-first.”

“Youthinkbut don’t actually know. Based on what he described, he seemed to be jumping around in time.”

“It’s something to go off of, at least,” Seth mumbles before Cody interjects, I assume to keep Seth and me from spinning around in our frustration.

“The original Sinners said the Slashers need to take breaks after they feed—at least in their early development. It’s a physical creature, an animal, so it grows and evolves like any other. If we’re right, we have some time to sort this out. I say we all meet with Luke again. This time, we have a more open dialogue about everything, including the Lust you two are experiencing, if you’re both comfortable sharing that. And then we start acquainting Luke with some of the tricks we’ve used. Help him figure out his powers the way we learned how to figure out ours. Luke’s powers seem to allow him to get inside this Slasher’s head. If he can find a way to control that, maybe we can find out where it’s hiding.”

“What if we don’t have time for that?” I ask.

“I’m not strong enough to go back under yet,” Cody says. “I do wonder if there’s a way I could piggyback off what Luke’s doing and maybe use that, but that’s gonna take time to figure out.”