Page 32 of Lust

It shouldn’t make me feel good knowing how much it hurts for him too, but I don’t even think it’s schadenfreude as much as assurance that the more it hurts for him, the less likely he is to deny me this thing I need. Now that I’m thinking rationally again, it’s clear the answer is simple: “While we figure out Cody’s visions, how about we agree to mess around, like, I don’t know, once a day? See if that makes things more tolerable?” I study his expression carefully, trying to read his answer, but he just stares at me. “Well?”

“You think I’m gonna say no to doing that once a day, Straight Boy?”

As I laugh, a smile plays across his lips.

“Then I’ll talk to Cody,” I tell him, “and we’ll sort this shit out, and then…go from there.” That’s the best I got right now. As he nods, he sets his drink between his legs, and I find myself resenting a fucking can for obscuring a part of his dick from me.

“That sounds like a plan I can get behind.”

“Please tell me that pun was intended.”

“Very much so.” He winks like he thinks he’s so goddamn clever, and I chuckle. It’s nice to be playful after spending the past few days struggling with pain and anxiety.

Although, I have a horrible feeling there’s plenty of pain and anxiety to come.

10

BRAD

Fucking around withLuke is intoxicating.

This isn’t like what I’m used to experiencing. Yeah, it can get hot and steamy, but what Luke and I do…that’s just us.

Wild, feral lust.

As though our bodies were designed for each other.

When Cody first warned us about Luke, I thought it would be easy to get rid of the guy, but with each taste he gives me, I realize how hard it’s gonna be for me if he leaves St. Lawrence.

As I take another sip of margarita, Luke’s gaze drifts to my necklace.

“What’s the story behind that? I’ve seen you grab it a few times, like you’re using it to access or enhance your powers. Seth has one too, and Cody was holding his when he was doing that thing to me.”

The guys won’t be happy if I start revealing all our secrets, but it’s not fair to expect Luke to uproot his whole life and future without anything.

“They help us control our powers. It’s one of the reasons Seth and I had a hard time believing you were doing these things without any knowledge or experience. Without these, we can still use our powers, but it’s much easier when we’re wearing them.”

“How do they help? Where did you get them from?”

I tense. “That’s starting to get into areas I should probably chat with the guys about before I answer.”

“So maybe this has something to do with where these powers come from. Something to do with the old church…?”

“At the rate you’re going, you’ll probably get to the answer on your own.”

“What are you worried about telling me?”

I choose my words carefully. “When we discovered this stuff, it was like playing with a Ouija board. I don’t know that any of us grasped how serious it was. But the more we messed around with our powers, the better we got, and the more we realized how powerful this is. How dangerous it could be in the wrong hands. So it’s something we’d rather keep to the people we trust. Not that I don’t trust you, but…”

He shrugs. “You don’t really know me, so I don’t take it personally.” He takes a sip of his drink, then sets it on the nightstand. “Surprised not all of you went with walking-sex-god as your power.”

I chuckle. “Doesn’t really work like that. We each sort of stumbled into our particular powers. And they relate to each of us for…reasons.”

The way he raises his brow, it’s clear that caught his interest.

“Okay, you’re gonna make it sound that intriguing and expect me not to be interested?”

“I guess I’m not really giving anything away by sharing this, maybe other than risking you knowing about the most embarrassing shit from my life. I never had any sex appeal. Was awkward and I’d get flustered when I was hitting on a guy. Couldn’t have told you who was gay or bi or straight to save my life, which led to some uncomfortable situations. My first sexual experience was freshman year, and I got performance anxiety. Guy started telling people how I couldn’t get it up, and a bunch of his friends started calling me Soft Serve.”

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