Page 28 of Lust

His lips look so adorable in that little smile, I’m tempted to—

No! Stop!

“I know it’s hard to imagine,” I say, “because of what a dick he was being to you, but Seth is a good guy. In the past, Cody dealt with a lot of issues that took him to some dark places, and Seth is just very protective of him. Like a brother. And he’s that way about anyone who hurts Cody. He accidentally gave him Covid last year, and he wouldn’t stop beating himself up over it.”

Luke’s gaze wanders. “I have an uncle who’s like that.”

“He’s the one who took you in after…” I stop myself, but Luke’s already looking at me. I’ve just reminded him of the other ways I’ve pried into his personal life.

“That’s right. Background check. So you know about my parents.” He’s quiet for a few moments, surely hating me forviolating his privacy. Then he turns to the picture on his desk, of him as a kid with his parents. “Yeah, my uncle took me in, and he’s been good to me. He knew this was my dream, coming to St. Lawrence. My dad was always talking about it, and that kind of thing leaves an impression on you, you know? After his aneurysm, I knew this is where I’d go. I was accepted freshman year, but I was devastated when I didn’t get a scholarship. Then when I made it for this year, it felt like fate. Being here makes me feel close to him. There’s something about knowing he wandered these halls. Lived in these dorms. I think he’d be proud.” He gulps.

“I’m sure he would be.” I hesitate, consider stopping myself, but since I already know this shit about him, it feels right to share. “It’s really beautiful that you care so much about your dad. Mine… The only reason he even fought for full custody was to fuck over my mom, who’s great. But once he had me, he never treated me like a kid. Hell, he was barely even home.”

“I’m sorry.”

I shrug. “It’s fine. It didn’t kill me, right?”

“A lot of things don’t kill us, but sometimes we wish they would.”

It’s a dark comment, one that resonates too deeply.

Seeing him sitting there, his lips frozen in a frown, impulses fire off within me. It’d be so easy to take all his pain away, to help him forget and give him relief. But since he’s been avoiding me all week, I doubt it’s what he wants right now.

“I should go,” I say, starting for the door.

A knot in my chest constricts, tightening as I get closer, but suddenly, I feel Luke’s hand against my wrist, and a rush shoots from my wrist to my shoulder.

That knot in my chest relaxes as I turn back to him.

His hand trembles against my wrist, a symptom of whatever withdrawal he’s enduring.

“Please, Brad,” he says, his voice full of desperation. “I’m trying to be strong right now because this is so fucking embarrassing. But if you walk out that door, it feels like I might die.”

His wide eyes tug at something in me.

“Don’t leave me like this,” he begs.

I won’t deny him.

That familiar sense kicks in, and I know exactly what he needs from me.

I place my free hand against his cheek, trailing my fingers across his flesh. He leans into my hold, taking a deep breath as the touch gives us both even more relief.

I guide him back until his shoulder blades are pressed against the wall between his and Alexei’s desks. When he tilts his head back, exposing his throat to me, I run my thumb down to his chin, then to his Adam’s apple, and around to his nape. His shaking subsides, as though his body is only content when it can revel in my touch.

Is it wrong how satisfying it is to know he needs this? Needs me?

I guide my hand farther down, probing the dip between his pecs and the rigid indentations in his abs. Then I lean close and offer a gentle bite against his throat.

He moans, and it’s music to my ears, the sound of the release of so much of the pain he’s been carrying around. It collides with my own relief, my belly vibrating with excitement, soaring because Luke and I are finally this close again.

Impulses I know aren’t me kick in, and I drop my hands, grabbing the hem of his shirt and pulling it off over his head. I squat down and hook my arms around his thighs, lifting him and placing his ass on the desktop. I lean close so our mouths are only inches apart.

With his eyes closed, he waits, but I linger, enjoying the buzz of excitement making my lips tingle.

Luke opens his eyes. “I thought you knew what I wanted.”

“I do. I’m just worried.”

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