Page 95 of Between Now and Always

“No way,” I mouth back before I whistle to get everyone’s attention.

“Thanks for coming tonight, guys. If you’d told me a year ago that this is what my life would be, I wouldn’t have believed it. I’ve learned some really important things since then and the biggest is that who I am and the kind of life I live, is entirely up to me. It’s my choice, not chance, that determines destiny.” I turn to look at Beth.

“Falling in love with you was the easiest thing I’ve ever done.Stayingthat way has been the hardest.”

“Ugh, dude, you know she can hear you, right?” Phil says and everyone laughs. I drop a kiss on my baby’s sweet mouth and we share a look that says I love you a million times in a million languages in the space of second.

“She knows what I mean. This hasn’t been easy. We’ve had to fight like hell, but it’s so damn worth it. You’re my person. We don’t need DNA tests, or licenses, or anyone’s approval to tell us that. I want this forever.”

She nods, and wipes a tear from her cheek. “I love you. But I’m gonna kill you for making me cry again.”

“Last time, I promise.” I kiss her. The loud buzz from my security panel sounds.

“Call when you get to Dallas tonight. And then before you set out tomorrow, okay?” My mom’s voice is fraught with worry.

“I promise. Don’t worry.” I press a kiss to the top of her head and hug her one last time.

“I wish I was going with you guys,” Beth says, her voice watery and thick with emotion.

“It’s not going to be a fun visit, Clo. And it’s just a few days,” Phil says and runs a gentle hand over her head.

I love that she has her brother again. I’m also ready for all of this to be done so we can start living a normal day to day. One where the drama of our pasts unfolding like one of those never ending nestled dolls.

“And you’ve got those agents to meet with next week,” Phil reminds her.

She grins now, big and bright. “Yeah, I’m so excited I can’t believe it’s happening.”

“Believe it. You’ve worked so hard for it. And I’ll be back in time to cheer really loud when you make a decision.”

“We all will,” Porsha says.

“Thank you, It means everything to me.”

“You mean everything to us,” Joe chimes in from his seat next to my mother. They’re holding hands. Their relationship has blossomed and even though I have moments where it feels strange to see her holding another man’s hand. But I’m happy she’s happy. And that Joe’s is, too.

“Come on, I’ll walk you out,” Beth says and I sling an arm around her neck and head toward the elevator. Jack and Porsha follow us on and I give him a “where the fuck are you going look,” that he returns with a grin I recognize from summers of sharing a room with him when he was home from college.

Beth is right.

These two are definitely hooking up.

When I kiss Beth goodbye before I climb into my car, the last thing I say is, “I can’t wait to get back so we can finally start making plans.”

In less than 72 hours, I’ll wish those words back. Too late, I’ll remember that plans are just a big red flag waved in the face of fate. And ours was going to come charging at us, horns first, ready to show us who was master.

The Devil’s Due

BETH

I’m on my way home from my Krav Maga class the next morning when my phone starts to ring. Halfway down the subway steps, I stop to see who it is.

“Hey,” a man behind me yelps right before he slams into me and sends us both stumbling down to the bottom.

“I’m sorry,” I call and look at my phone. My stomach lurches. I sprint up the steps, taking them two at a time to get back above ground where I have reception.

The call is now showing as missed and I call right back.

“How did you get this number?” I ask not bothering with a polite greeting. My my ire and suspicion are extinguished and replaced by worry at the sound the jagged crying on the other end of the phone.

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