Page 38 of Restorations

I don’t move. “Why didn’t you tell me this last night? I would have listened.”

The shoulder I'm resting on lifts in a shrug. “I don’t know. I don’t talk about her.”

“I understand.” I can feel him trying to smile, knowing he wants this to go away. We stay like that for a moment, and then I take a deep breath, knowing I have to make a change. “I think you and I need to be over.”

He turns, cupping my face in his hands as he does, his eyes kind. “I think we never really began.”

I nod in agreement and let my eyes drift down to his chest over his tattoo, with his hands still on my face. “That might be why.”

He turns and uses his hands to swivel my head toward the wall Asher and I share. “And that.”

I nod my head sadly, and he drops his hands, releasing me. I point at the letter on his chest. “You know, at first I thought that could have stood for Penelope. Linc calls her P.”

He chuckles and stands up, pulling a shirt over his chest. “Fuck. No. I’ve never touched Penelope. I don’t need all that fucking drama.”

I laugh and find a shirt and shorts to pull on. “Do you think Asher really contacted her?”

I see the flash of anger on his beautiful face and see his hands flex at his sides. “I don’t know, but I want to rip his fucking head off, just thinking about it.”

It confirms what I already knew. He has strong feelings for Piper. And neither of us is in love with the other.

“We can still be friends, right?”

He walks to me and kisses my forehead. “You aren’t ever getting rid of me. And neither is Baz.”

I smile, feeling relieved. “Good.”

He shrugs, smiling and finding his way back to the Sawyer I know. “And if you ever need some good dick, you know where to go.”

I roll my eyes at him and shake my head. “Don’t ever change, Sawyer.”

He winks and gives me a quick kiss before exiting my room.

I feel oddly empty as he leaves but not in the same way I felt when I walked away from Asher, leaving him in Kansas.

I lay back on my bed, covering my aching eyes with my arm.

Once again, I've made a massive mess for myself.

18

ASHER

Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me! Fuck my life.

I walk out of my bedroom after a shitty night’s sleep, still hating the world. But now I want to scream up to the heavens and ask what the fuck kind of karma is this shit.

Sawyer walks out of Viv’s room, a shit-eating grin on his face, his hair mussed from a night of passion with Viv, and my fists clench at my side, dying to wipe that smile off his face for good.

But it fades on its own when he sees me. “Asher.” He grabs the back of his neck, and we stand in awkward silence, locked in a stare down neither of us will win.

He clears his throat and drops his hand, looking back at Viv’s door and then huffs, shaking his head as he faces me. “That could have been you last night. It could have been you walking out of her room this morning.” He shakes his head again. “Or staying in there, cuddling and spooning or whatever the fuck true lovers do.”

Yup. Still feeling homicidal.

“Don’t you fucking dare tell me it could be me when it was you.”

“Asher, wake the fuck up.” He takes a daring step closer to me. “It wasn’t me. It’s never been me.”