Page 31 of Restorations

“So then, why are you trying so fucking hard to be my friend?”

She surprises me when she uncrosses her arms, placing one hand on my chest. My flesh sizzles from her touch as her eyes meet mine. “Because you were my friend, and I can’t stand you hating me.”

I want to push her away, but I stand still, staring into her eyes, missing her and hating it. “I can’t be your friend. I tried that and got burned.”

“I left because I couldn’t take being near you.”

“You took Baz too. You left me behind like all the rest of them.”

I can’t take the look of pity on her face. I grab her wrist, surprising her, but I don’t hurt her. I only push her hand away and walk to the pool, jumping into the deep end, needing space.

When I pop back up, I’m hoping she’ll be gone, but I know better and see her heels first before my eyes slide up her toned legs and all her curves before my eyes meet hers. “We live together again, Asher, because you wanted to. You’re going to have to face me sometime.”

I brush the water off my face with one hand. “Not tonight.”

She nods her head slowly, taking a deep breath. “Thank you for watching Baz today.”

“Anytime.”

I sink back under the water, and my thoughts go back to never resurfacing.

But I’d never do that to Baz. He’s my reason to keep going, and I want to be better.

But I have no idea how to do that.

15

VIVIENNE

It’s only been a few days since I tried to talk to Asher by the pool. My conversation with Penelope made me want to try, at the very least, to be his friend. But he made it pretty clear he doesn’t want that.

Baz is spending the night with Nora tonight, and Lola is staying with Hayden. I guess I didn’t want to be alone in the house with Asher, or maybe I don’t trust myself, so I sent a text to Sawyer.

I missed him this week, and he has a rare night off. So, he came over, bringing rum, cola, snacks, and the best part of all, his smile.

He doesn’t hate me. He isn’t all broody and pissed-off. His smile is bright, beautiful, and genuine.

I take a drink of my rum and cola, mixed strong enough to forget about this week and lay back in the lounge chair out by the pool with Sawyer kicked back in the chair next to me. He came over this evening wearing swim trunks and a t-shirt that clings perfectly to his sinewy muscles.

I think I'm staring. I don’t remove my eyes from him as I sip my rum, and a giggle escapes my mouth. He looks at me curiously, his own drink in hand. “What’s so funny?”

I shake my head and take another drink. “I honestly have no idea.”

He laughs, shaking his head at me. “You already buzzed? I told you, you should have had more dinner.”

Oh yeah, he brought dinner too. See? Things with Sawyer are just so damn uncomplicated. Except for the whole “we aren’t in love” thing. I laugh again, light and airy. and he laughs with me, taking another drink.

I didn’t go to parties in high school, and in college, I was a single mom, so I didn’t go to them then either. So I guess a part of me is enjoying letting loose with Sawyer out by the pool. It’s summer after all, and I know Baz is in very capable loving hands. I turn up the music on my phone that’s connected to a speaker and tap my feet at the end of the lounge chair.

“I like you like this, you know?”

I swivel my head to look over at him again. “Like what?”

He finishes his drink and stands up. “Free. Happy. You’re a lot of fun when you aren’t being a tightass.”

I roll my eyes and finish my drink, handing him my cup, knowing he’s going for a refill. “Gee, thanks.”

He chuckles as he takes my cup and his over to the outdoor bar. He hands me my now-full glass, setting his down on the table between us, and slips his shirt off over his head.

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