Page 53 of There Are No Words

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Allegra

If he was going to kiss me, he was way off the mark. I didn’t just want a kiss from this man. I wanted everything he had to give. I wanted to throw caution to the wind like I had that night in his pub, grab the back of his neck, and feel my way through the turmoil waging war in my head. I wanted to silence all my doubts.

If Baby wasn’t involved, if it wouldn’t have affected her, I would have done it.

I would have toyed with my own emotions. If for no other reason than to give myself the chance to say that I knew what it was like to be with a man like Brady—and I wasn’t just talking about sexually.

His eyes traced my lips like he was about to feast on his prey and was happy about it—hungrily.

Maybe a kiss would do. Maybe it’d suffice.

We were so close to one another all I really had to do was move, even a twitch of my lips would do the trick, and our lips would be touching. I’d be kissing Brady Moore.

I wished I could kick myself for what I was about to do. And maybe one day I would, in fact, kick myself for this, but in this moment, it felt like the right thing to do.

I placed my hands on his shoulders and pushed him back.

His brows furrowed, and his expression grew confused at my push. Of course he was confused. We both wanted this. I had justadmitted I wanted him. My body clearly wanted him. His body definitely wanted mine, I could feel it.

Nothing needed to be said. I couldn’t be sure what was running through his head, but I did know this—I hated myself.

I ran a hand up and down my arm, trying to release the pent-up energy I had.

Meanwhile, he got up without a word, rubbed a hand over his mouth, and walked to the door.

“Brady,” I stopped him.

He turned around and cleared his throat. “What?”

I shook my head. I couldn’t say what I wanted to, which was how resisting him was one of the hardest things I’d ever done in my life. He wouldn’t understand my fears. So instead, I patted the spot on the bed beside me and slid over to make room for him. “Would you stay with me? Please? We could watch a movie.”

He looked wrecked, like he was having an internal battle, something I knew about all too well. “Sure.” He strode over, looking less frustrated.

I moved my legs and slid them under the sheet. “It’s cold in here. Is the heat on?”

He nodded as he climbed into my bed and leaned against the headboard with me. “Yeah, but don’t worry, I’ll keep you warm,” he assured me as he brought his arm around my shoulder.

I snuggled into him, taking in a deep breath and decidedly leaving my pregnancy pillow on the chair by my bed for the night.

Maybe if things were different.

IfIwasn’t different.

If I believed he’d stick around long-term.

If I hadn’t seen it happen time and time again—Allegra Morelli ending up alone.

Then we could make a good couple. But none of that was the case, and the facts remained, so I was doing all three of us a favor.

* * *

“Dad did it. He did it!” I shouted and shook Brady awake as I read the latest email from my dad, a hand on my belly, rubbing it absentmindedly.

I knew what you were thinking. . . . Brady had been in bed with me, so what changed?

The answer was simple—nothing. Nothing changed. We watched a movie, fell asleep, and here we were the morning after. Sorry to disappoint.

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