Page 3 of Anastasia

“Hey, don’t cry. It’s going to be okay,” I assured, even though I felt like crying myself.

“Mum is not a bad person. I know that she isn’t. If I ever die, I just want to make sure you don’t forget about her. Continue to help her as if I were still alive,” Alex let out as I started the car. My eyes narrowed as I processed her words.

“You are notdying, so don’t say anything like that again. You are going to help me get Mum sober. I know that I can’t do something like that without you, okay?” I reprimanded her. We were already down the road, I was driving at the speed limit—possibly a little faster than legally accepted.

She didn’t respond to my words, so I took it as her agreement. When I looked through the rearview mirror once more, I could still see the tears in her eyes.

“You’re not dying.”

Anastasia

Leukemia. My little sister had stage four leukemia. No matter how hard my mind tried to grasp that there was almost nothing the doctors could do, I failed.

I stared at my sister, who was sleeping soundly due to the medicine the doctor had given her. I couldn’t help but pace back and forth around the room as I tried calling my mother over and over again. At first, it seemed as if she were ignoring my calls, but it soon turned into every call I made going to voicemail.

Throwing myself on the chair, I brought my hands up to my face as tears streamed down my face. I could only focus on the dust that fluttered around the room as I thought about not being able to see my sister again. Never in my life could I imagine having to bury my little sister. She was always supposed to outlive me.

A knock sounded on the door, leaving me with a mere moment to wipe my tears away before it opened. A woman strolled in wearing a smile on her face. I knew she could see how I had just been crying because pity began prancing around all over her face, but I didn’t need any of her pity, I just needed Alex to be okay.

“I’m sorry, but I must say, you might need some sort of help. Going through this is a very scary process, and I’d hate for you to do this all on your own,” the lady said. Based on the pantsuit instead of scrubs or lab coat, I could tell she wasn’t a doctor.

My shoulders dropped as I turned toward Alex. “I’m fine because I’m not alone. I have my little sister right there. She’s helping me by staying alive—that’s enough for the both of us,” I stated. The woman gave me one more smile, with pity dancing around on the rim of her lips, before glancing down at her clipboard.

“I wanted to stop by and explain what leukemia is and what to expect throughout this entire process. As mentioned, Alexandria is suffering from stage four leukemia. Most cancers are staged based on tumors and the amount of spreading. Leukemia is based on blood cell counts and the accumulation of the leukemia cells in organs. Alexandria has a very rare case for her age of chronic lymphocytic leukemia. It has spread to her liver, her bone marrow, her lymph nodes, and her blood. It’s spreading through her body like a wildfire,” the woman explained. As she talked, I could just feel my hands shaking, and my mind screaming at me. I am such a terrible sister. How could I have not known my sister was sick all this time?

“The doctor can’t state how long she’s had the disease, but he says that it doesn’t look good. We can get her started on chemotherapy as soon as possible to see if we can kill any of those cancerous cells and relieve some of her symptoms. A really good doctor who wants to help Alexandria is arriving soon. He is on his way and will do his best to assure a potential recovery for her,” the lady finished, allowing faith to surge into my heart. As scary as my sister’s cancer sounded, I only hoped the doctor was as good as the lady said he was.

Taking a deep breath, I tried not to cry in front of her. All I could do was nod my head while she began to write some more things down on her clipboard. The sound of her pen scribbling down nonsense flowed into my ears.

“I’ll let the doctor know to get her started on chemotherapy right away. Now, we have to discuss the ugly part of this. Do you happen to have insurance?Medicaid, Medicare, anything to help cover expenses?” the lady asked, raising a brow as she sent a soft, reassuring smile my way. I bit down on my lip as I shook my head.They’re asking for some way to pay for all of this.My head began to spin as I thought about the cost of everything. I thought I was in debt already seeing as my family was behind in almost every bill, but now, with Alex’s medical expenses, we would be completely robbed of money for years.Maybe I could pick some hours up at the diner, or I could even find a second job.

“We can’t deny you care, Ms. Smith. No matter what, we’ll be sure to do all we can for your sister, but the cost will pile up quickly. Cancer treatment isn’t cheap,” she said softly.

Closing my eyes, I could feel a stray tear roll down my cheek. Before it could completely fall, I harshly wiped it away.

“Okay,” I whispered.

Her features slowly returned to a soft smile as she wrote more things down on the clipboard. “I’ll be back shortly after discussing future treatment with your doctor and seeing what we can do to help you out financially.”

The moment she was gone, I picked up my phone and dialed my mother’s number. Once again, it went straight to voicemail. As soon as I hung up the phone, a sob ripped out of me.

“I hate her! I hate her so fucking much! Why can’t she just be a normal parent for once?” I shouted.

When I turned to glance at my sister, she was already staring up at me. A look of melancholy was obvious on her features. After closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, I smiled at her. “How do you feel?”

“Nana, I know she isn’t the best Mum in the world. We live in a world that wants to bring us down. We waste so much time being angry with others and ourselves.I’m still here, aren’t I? I’m still breathing, and I can still move.” She chuckled before raising her arms up and down. “Hate is an ugly word. Mum is still in there somewhere, and it is nothing but a waste of time to hate the disease that is keeping her away from herself. Time is limited in this world, and if we don’t look for the positive moments—what the hell are we living for? You’re my big sister, and I’ll love you always, no matter what you do with your life. I may be dying of a disease, the same way she is, you need to stick by her exactly like I know you’re sticking by me. We need to—ow.”

I gasped out as she gripped her side with a grimace on her face. Instinctively, I reached out for her, hoping she would allow me to be there for her.

Suddenly, her eyes widened as she looked up at me. “How are we going to pay for this? Mum can’t work with the record she has, and you can’t afford this treatment,” Alex pointed out.

“Don’t worry about anything. I’ll figure it all out, like I always do. I’m going to go call a nurse,” I said, touching the top of her head before walking out of the room. One of the nurses automatically perked up from behind the desk. She walked around the counter to come toward me.

“She keeps clutching her side in pain,” I informed her. She quickly nodded before entering the room. Her eyes were immediately on Alex as she began to do something with her IV.

“I’ll be right back with some more pain medication. Dr. Flores is one of the best oncologists in the nation. He is eager to meet you, Alexandria. He’ll be here as soon as he lands,” the nurse stated with a bright smile. Once she finished changing the IV, the nurse exited the room.

“Don’t you have to work today?” my sister asked.

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