Page 7 of Reclaiming Love

He didn’t answer.

Have it your own way. She walked off, leaving him furiously rowing. She hadn’t noticed this sulky streak in him in the beginning, but now it was starting to piss her off.

Later, freshly showered and smelling like verbena, she walked along the sidewalk, almost tasting the muffin she hadn’t even bought yet.

The gym, only a few blocks from work, was subsidized by her employer. Matt had been coming religiously ever since he’d joined the company. Until she’d started dating him, going to the gym was something that other people did. Though that was why his body was so hard, and the guy looked good, strutting about the way he did. Her friends in accounts still grilled her for details about him.

Now, more than a few months into their relationship, Melissa didn’t have many good things to brag about anymore. The Matt she had met seemed to slip away, only coming out occasionally. She was beginning to discover a darker, more sinister side to him. A side that often had her acting like a Melissa she didn’t know—a shell of herself, always eager to please him.

Of course, it wasn’t only him. She’d had lots to contend with at work too, what with Nadine being away for so long. But now with Nadine back in San Francisco, things were even busier. It helped that her boss was just a door away from her. But workwise, the pressure at the advertising company never let up.

She walked into the coffee shop and scanned her gaze around casually. No sight of him. She placed her order and waited, looking around every now and then. Now that they’d managed a few words, that he’d come to know her name, she’d been hoping to run into him some more.

She hadn’t stopped to think about it—the fact that she looked out for him now. And she only came to this realization because her disappointment at his absence highlighted the fact.

A few minutes later her order was ready, taking her by surprise. It depended on who worked there on what particular morning. This morning, it was the speedy pony-tailed guy working the coffee machine. He was a whiz at it and it was no wonder her order was ready so fast.

She turned around, having picked up her muffin and skinny latte—it had taken her weeks to get used to drinking skinny milk, but Matt said it was best. Even though he wasn’t here, she still felt obliged to order it, now that she’d gotten used to the bitter taste of coffee when she had it.

Balancing her muffin in one hand and her coffee in the other, she grabbed a napkin from the side counter.

“Blueberry muffin day?” A smile and a finger pointed at the package she held in her hand.

Soft brown eyes, long lashes. It was him.

“I like blueberries,” she replied, though blueberries were not the cause of the goose bumps that suddenly popped up all over her arms.

“I prefer chocolate chip.” He held out his own muffin for her to see.

“Nice but too many calories for me.” She paused, stopped smiling when his face hardened.

“You don’t need to worry about calories,” he said, his face serious.

Nice to hear verification that I’m fine the way I am.A guy like this wouldn’t tell her what to eat or how hard to work out. A guy like this…

She closed her eyes, blinking away the mere possibility of what it might be like.

It wouldn’t do to dwell on things like that. For now, it was enough to run into him every now and then since it lessened the blow of Matt’s put-downs. She wasn’t sure if she noticed them more as time went on, or whether Matt had become more critical of her the longer she knew him.

“You don’t, Melissa,” he said, when she didn’t say anything back.

In the empty gap between them, where words should have come easily but didn’t, she struggled to find something to say. Because she wanted to say something. She didn’t want to move on past him and walk out the door. She’d been thinking about him, in the background of her conscious thought, and here he was. She intended to savor this moment for as long as possible. But the line he was in shifted, and either she took a step backwards to keep up with him—giving him the wrong impression that she was interested in him—or she could continue on her way out.

“I hope you enjoy it,” she replied, getting ready to leave.

“You too.” From the subdued tone of his voice, it didn’t seem as though he was too eager for her to go either.

She dragged herself away. Nadine would be waiting and Melissa knew she couldn’t stay much longer having a conversation with a total stranger.

Even if he did make her feel happy inside.

It was only when she crossed the road to head into work that she realized she still didn’t know his name.

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