Page 29 of Branded Hearts

I laugh and nod. “Yep, that’s the one. I really should finish it.”

But truth be told, the reason I haven’t finished it is because it’s just so damn raunchy, I’ve had to pause before getting too flustered.

Amanda adds, “Oh, the one full of cowboys and some steamy sex scenes? Don’t forget your vibrator while reading.” This earns a laugh from the girls, but I can feel my face heating up, blushing hard at the mention.

“Amanda!” I admonish, feeling my cheeks burn.

“What? If you’re reading that cowboy or fairy porn, you gotta have some form of relief, right?” Amanda quips.

I smack my forehead, the girls’ giggles filling the space between us. “How do you even know all of this?” I ask.

“Honey, I may be ancient, but I’ve read my fair share of romance novels over the years. I’ll have you know, my sex life is still quite lively thanks to those books, and Gerry never complains, so...” Amanda’s words trail off with a mischievous grin.

“Oh, my god! I don’t think we need to know that,” I exclaim out loud.

Jamie chimes in with a laugh, “You dirty woman, you! Don’t mind her, she’s a little prude.” I gasp in disbelief, smacking Jamie on the arm.

“What? Hun, do you even own a vibrator?” she questions with a raised brow.

I feign embarrassment, but I can’t help but wonder. I’ve never owned a vibrator before, never had the urge to buy one. Do I need one? Is that what girls these days have?

Jamie notices the look on my face, and hers lights up. “Oh, mygod! Youdon’thave one?” she says in disbelief. “We’re gonna have to change that. I’m going to order you a few of my favourites.”

Oh, kill me now.

“No, that’s okay.” I say, blushing.

Kristie then puts her hand up. “No, no. We’re getting you oneortwo alright,” she says with a wink.

How did this conversation go from talking about work to sex and vibrators?Good lord.

I lift my glass to take a big gulp of my drink to ease these rampant thoughts, but as I do, Amanda exclaims, “Fuck the vibrators. We need to find her a man,” and the contents of my drink are spit out as I choke on the liquid.

Jamie makes atsksound. “Look what you did now! Made her choke on her drink.”

“It’s not her drink she should be choking on,” Amanda adds, throwing in an exaggerated wink.

Oh, for heaven’s sake.The girls burst out in a raucous laughter.

Jamie chimes in, turning to Amanda, “I don’t think I’ll ever get used to hearing you swear.”

“What?!” Amanda shrieks. “I swear all the time, clearly.” The girls burst into more laughter, and I can’t help but join in. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” she adds for good measure. “There ya go! How’s that for swearing?” This earns even more laughter from the girls.

Amanda then turns to me, holding her thumb out. “This one never swears! I think we need to loosen her up a bit.”

Jamie then adds, “In more ways than one, apparently.”

“Remember that time you stubbed your toe at work and yelled, ‘Oh, fiddlesticks!’?” Kristie says, trying to hold back her laughter.

“And what about the time you dropped your lunch and yelled, ‘Holy guacamole!’?” Jamie adds, giggling.

“Oh, wait! What was that word you said the other day, ‘Son of a what?’”

“Biscuit,” I finish for Kristie, with a roll of my eyes.

Stella chimes in, “Yeah, that phrase should be ‘Son of a bitch!’”

“Hey, they work just as well! Why do I need to swear?”

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