Page 55 of An Indecent Longing

As Ben walked through to the kitchen, he sucked in a breath, hoping he’d be able to breathe until Ian and Dorrie worked out their differences.

Ian had walked into the room just as Ben wrapped Dorrie in his arms and kissed her.

The sight should’ve made him want to rip Ben’s arms off.

The fact that it didn’t… He’d have to give that serious thought. Later.

Now, he needed to figure out what the hell he was going to say to Dorrie. Because keeping his distance was no longer an option. He could’ve blamed Ben for pushing him into this, but he only had himself to blame.

He wanted her, the longing building into a constant ache that he needed to satisfy. Then maybe he could finally expunge it.

If that seemed harsh… Well, life wasn’t all puppy dogs and rainbows, was it?

Sometimes, life gave you a beautiful woman you couldn’t have.

Dorrie stared at him from across the room, chin high, mouth set. But her eyes…

Damn, those eyes looked bruised. Because of him.

He could tell she wanted to say something but sank her teeth into her bottom lip to hold it back. Waiting for him.

What the hell did he say?

Did he lay it all on the line, tell her he knew who she worked for and that it disgusted him? That he wanted her in spite of that?

Did he tell her that the man she worked for had been responsible for his dad’s death? And that he wanted to despise her but couldn’t because he wanted to throw her on his bed and sink deep inside her?

And that he had the growing desire to watch her come apart while Ben fucked her?

She’d call him a prick and he’d deserve it. And she’d never let him get as close to her as she’d gotten to Ben.

So what the fuck did he say?

“I never meant to deliberately hurt you.”

Her head tilted to the side, her expression unchanged. “It certainly felt deliberate.”

He shook his head. “If I had wanted to deliberately hurt you, you wouldn’t be standing here right now. You know nothing about me, Dorrie.”

Her eyes narrowed. “You’re absolutely right. I have to wonder if everything you told me was a lie because the man I met three months ago isn’t the same man standing here.”

His jaw locked as that one hit a little too close to home. “What do you want to hear, Dorrie? What I told you that night still stands. I’m not an easy guy to get to know. There are things I can’t tell you, things I don’t want you to know about me. Things I’ve done that would make you cringe.”

Her gaze dropped and she swallowed hard. “And how do you know that I don’t have my own secrets?”

“Everyone has secrets. Some are just too much for other people to handle.”

“Why did you even bother with me that night?”

Because he’d been smitten. He wanted to know who the fuck had come up with that word because he wanted to beat the shit out them. It sounded medieval but it perfectly explained the way he’d felt the first time he’d seen her.

“Because I couldn’t fucking walk away. I saw you, and for the first time in months, I found a woman who made me want to ignore the rest of the fucking world.”

He realized his voice had risen until he was almost shouting. But Dorrie didn’t back down, didn’t cringe.

She stood there, watching him with a steady gaze. No fear in her eyes, thank God. He didn’t want to scare her. But he did see anger.

“Then what happened?” Her hands went to her hips, demanding an answer. “Why did you disappear? You treated me like a freaking leper and you never gave me the chance to ask why.”

---