Page 112 of An Indecent Longing

And if she did and he became even more distant than he’d been the past week? She wasn’t sure she could handle that. She’d have to call her dad and make him hire someone else, which she knew he would do in a heartbeat.

And then he’d want to know what Ian and Ben had done to deserve getting fired, and she couldn’t exactly tell him she was upset that they hadn’t touched her after she’d spent time in both their beds, separately and together.

Oh my god, she might just dissolve into a puddle and die right then.

“Dorrie? You okay? You look a little flushed.”

More like mortified.

Shaking her head, she made her lips move in an approximation of a smile. “Yes, I’m fine. Just a little warm.”

She glanced at Ben, who didn’t look convinced. In fact, his expression looked pretty damn disbelieving. But it was July in the city and close to ninety degrees. Yes, the air conditioning was running but still…

And that’s your guilt talking.

It was. At least she could admit it to herself.

Shaking her head, she sighed. “You know who I work for. One of his men needed to be stitched up. That’s what I was doing this afternoon.”

After a few seconds, Ben unclenched his jaw enough to speak. “Does that happen a lot?”

She sighed. She’d cracked open the door, might as well throw it open as wide as she could. Maybe she’d actually feel better with this all out in the open.

“It depends. If there’s something going on street-level, I could see ten or fifteen guys a week. Gunshots, knife wounds, broken bones, bruises, punctured lungs, I can deal with almost anything in-office except massive internal injuries. I don’t crack chests and I don’t make cuts more than a couple of inches long.”

Several beats of silence passed.

“And you’re okay with this setup?”

“Yes.”

She could tell he wanted to say something else but he managed not to. Probably because they’d reached his home.

But when he’d closed the back door behind him and reset the alarm, he turned to her and she knew they were about to have a conversation she wasn’t entirely sure she could handle.

She’d much rather strip naked and spread herself on the counter than have this conversation now.

So she took a page out of her sister’s playbook and went on the offensive.

“Is that the reason you haven’t laid a finger on me since Sunday?”

Ben’s mouth dropped open for a split second before his eyes went wide. “Excuse me?”

Sucking in a deep breath, she pushed on, trying to channel her sister’s confidence. “Is the reason you haven’t touched me since we had sex Sunday morning because you think I shouldn’t be working for Mr. Antonoff? Or is it because I’m now a client and off limits?”

He shook his head. “I don’t—”

“I’ve worked for him for years. I’ve stitched up more gunshot wounds than I ever saw during my rotations at the hospital. I’ve saved more than one man’s life because if he’d gone to an emergency room, those doctors might’ve pushed him farther down the wait list because no one would care if some shady low-life thug stopped breathing, right? Except they’re not all thugs. Did you know most of the men in m—Mr. Antonoff’s organization have families? Their children get sick, they come to me. Their wives have a lump in their breast, they come to me. I diagnose their mothers with Alzheimer’s and help them find a good private care nurse. Which he pays for. Did you know that?”

“Dorrie, wait—”

“I had a guy the other day. You’d see him on the street and cross three lanes of traffic to avoid him. He has a daughter who’s the most beautiful baby in the world. She needs diapers and food and maybe one day she’ll need medical care because she’s diagnosed with asthma.”

“Dorrie—”

“And I know you’re going to say I’m rationalizing but—”

Ben wrapped a hand around her neck and put his mouth over hers, kissing her with barely restrained lust. This was no chaste peck. It was a full-on assault on her senses and it should have embarrassed her how easily she gave in to him.

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