Page 77 of The Charlie Method

Dante gestures to the foldable lawn chair against the wall. “Pull up a chair. Sit.”

“I’m too antsy to sit.” I wander around the garage, my boots wearing holes in the floor. “I need advice. I’ve been chatting with these guys online—”

“Nice. I was hoping this would be a man problem. All right. Let’s dig in.” He wipes his hands on a rag, then reaches into a nearby cooler. “What’s your poison?”

“Anything nonalcoholic.”

“You’re no fun.” But he tosses me an energy drink instead.

Great. That’s the last thing I need—to chug a Power Monster AKA Adderall in liquid form. My mind’s already racing as it is. But I still crack open the tab and take a long swig.

“Okay, so these guys you’re talking to… Are they hot?”

“Next level hot,” I moan. “And they want to meet me.”

“So what’s the problem—” Dante stops, answering his own question. “Right. You don’t like dating multiple people at the same time. I remember you said that once.”

“No, that’s not the issue. They don’t want to meet separately. This isn’t two different guys. It’s like one guy, but two.”

“You totally lost me.”

“They’re like one guy because it’s one account. They’re one account.”

“For someone who’s supposed to be super intelligent, you’re not articulating this well at all.” He sputters with laughter. “What the hell are you trying to say?”

“I’m saying that the two of them share an account the same way they like to share women.”

Dead silence falls over the garage.

Dante gapes at me. Then he breaks out in a delighted grin.

“You were shopping for a threesome?”

“Well, not actively. But I saw their profile and…like I said, next level hot. We matched, and we’ve been chatting for a few weeks, but now they want to meet in person.”

“Okay. Great. Do it.”

His lack of hesitation gives me pause. “Really? You think I should go and have a drink with them?”

“Why did you spend all this time chatting with them then? If you just wanted a little bit of cyber action, cool. But that’s a long time to keep talking to someone. Or someones, I guess.” He searches my face. “Do youwantto have a drink with them?”

I bite my lip in dismay. “I’ve never done anything like this before, Dante.”

“First time for everything.”

“What if I meet them and don’t want to hook up?”

“Then I’m afraid to inform you, but you’ll have to lie there like a sacrificial virgin and let them run train on you.”

“What!”

He doubles over laughing. “Jesus, Charlie! If you don’t want to hook up, then you won’t hook up. No one’s forcing you to have sex with two guys. Where do they want to meet?”

“I don’t know. All they said was let’s have a drink.”

“Okay.” He thinks it over, then continues as if he’s reading from the official threesome manual. “I suggest doing it in public. Tell someone where you are—it can be me if you want. Text me their names, photos. Don’t drink anything they offer you, just in case. Suss them out, and then decide if you want to, you know, bang two dudes.”

I can’t fight my amusement. “Why are you being so casual about this?”

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