Page 49 of All That She Needs

"Asha, sweetheart." he shook his head, dropping his hands to look at me. His beautiful golden eyes flare with torment. "How can you still be so good to me? You should punch me, kick me, curse at me. I deserve the worst. I know I do. You have every reason to leave me. But I still love you. Stay with me. Please, Asha."

"I can't," I replied after a painful pause.

"Oh, God." He leaned back, staring at the ceiling. "It hurts so much."

Aiden looked so defeated that I wanted to hold him. I still loved him, but I knew I couldn't be with him anymore. It was just as heartbreaking for me as it was for him. I scooted closer, resting my head on his chest and flattening my palm over his heartbeat like I'd done so many times before. I looked up at him.

"It's difficult for me too, Aiden," I said quietly. "I'm still angry, but I don't hate you. I could never hate you. I'm not doing this to hurt you. It's just... too much damage has been done. It's impossible to go back."

"I know," he said softly. "And it's all my fault. But I'm not giving up, Asha." His gaze hardened with resolve. "I won't stop trying."

"Aiden, do it for the kids. But not for me. It's too late."

"It's never too late," he mumbled, his hand gently caressing my back.

"I don't understand, Aiden." I pulled away, suddenly frustrated. I searched his eyes. "I thought you'd leave me and run to her the first chance you got. I'm now giving you a way out and you're saying you want me back? Is it because she's engaged?" Dennis had told me a few days ago, and after hearing it, I asked my lawyer to speed things up. I didn't want Aiden staying with me out of obligation or because he thought he had no other option. I refused to be his second choice. But at the same time, I wanted him to be happy. If she could give him that, I wanted him to have it, to go after her. I knew it was foolish, but my love for him was that deep—enough to let him go if it meant he'd find the happiness I couldn't give him.

Aiden turned to me, now the one confused. "You know everything, don't you? Who told you?"

"Not important. Just answer me."

"Asha," He sighed. "If that's what I really want, do you think her being engaged would stop me?" his knuckles grazing my cheek. "You know me better than that, Asha."

"Then why?"

"Because I've set my priorities straight. It's you and the kids." Aiden sounded calm and certain when he answered. I wanted so badly to believe him, but I still couldn't.

"But you love her."

"I love you." He whispered, as he pushed my hair back behind my ear.

"No, Aiden." I shook my head, pushing myself away, suddenly needing distance. I was so frustrated with him. Icouldn't understand him. "I don't get it. You wereobsessedwith her. I've never seen you like that—not even with me. You were so wrapped up in her you ignored everything else. And now, just like that, you've changed your mind?"

He looked at me, his eyes filled with sadness. "I was hurting you so much, wasn't I?" he murmured, avoiding my question. His hands gently reached out, cupping my cheeks. "I understand if you can't forgive me. I wouldn't blame you. But I promise, I'll spend the rest of my life trying to earn it. I won't stop, no matter how long it takes. Trust me on that."

His hands felt like they were burning me, so I turned my head away. I couldn't believe I was about to say this, but I had to. "Go find your happiness, Aiden. Go to her."

"How many times do I have to say it?" He sounded exasperated. "My happiness is with you. I'm probably a little too late to realize that, but I've learned my lesson. I lost sight of what really matters, and I won't make that mistake again."

"Don't be a martyr, Aiden. I don't want you to stay out of obligation or guilt. It hurts my pride, and I hate that."

"Why do you want to push me to her so bad, Asha?" He suddenly snapped. "Is there someone else in your life now? Liam, is it? Do I need to remind you we haven't officially divorced yet?"

I gaped at him in disbelief, knowing that he was referring to the text message from Liam he saw last time. But I couldn't believe he was accusingmeof cheating when he was the one who was having an affair for months! "Liam is a friend. That's all he is right now, and that's all you need to know. But don't you dare accuse me of cheating? I never cheated on you, no matter how many temptations come my way."

Aiden's expression shifted, a mix of regret and frustration in his eyes. "I'm sorry. I know I don't have the right to question you, but I'm struggling with all of this. I'm genuinely trying to regain your trust, but it feels like you keep pushing me toward her, and I don't understand why."

"Because there's no reconciliation for us, Aiden. Don't you get it? We're too broken, and I can't spend the rest of my life wondering if you'll betray me again. I wouldn't be able to move past that." I sighed brokenly. "Aiden, you love her, and maybe it's true that you love me, too. But you never needed me like you neededher.Not until you realize I'm going to leave you."

"Oh, Asha." He groaned, covering his face with his hands. "I don't know how else to make you believe me."

"I want to find my own happiness, Aiden, don't you see? I deserve it." I said quietly, feeling tears well up despite myself. I hated it. I was determined not to be weak, and I had promised myself I wouldn't cry.

"I'll make you happy, Asha," he promised, lifting his head to meet my eyes. He looked so determined, so sure. "I promise."

"Can you?" I asked softly. "Tell me, Aiden, do you still love her?"

He shook his head, but his voice faltered. "I keep telling you I love you. I really do. I never stopped, Asha."