Page 23 of Seven of Hearts

I had kept him far away from the outskirts of my mind. If I didn’t think about him, I wouldn’t crack and text him.

But now, he had been here—in my most sacred space. In the place where I had hidden away to fall apart after finding out I was pregnant.

Unexpected and unplanned as it was, I wanted this baby. I had always wanted to be a mother. It was one of the reasons my last relationship had ended.

Maybe for me it was a blessing in disguise. But the look of devastation on Logan’s face when I answered the door...I’d never forgive myself for upending his life.

Logan Solomon had been the one I had always wanted, the one who got away, and the one I could never have.

For the first time in my life, I felt truly alone.

Kylie had been a great support for the physical things—bringing me food when I couldn’t stomach anything more than mashed potatoes and ginger ale. Waiting in the lobby of the doctor’s office while I went in for my appointment.

But she could never know that?—

Oh no.

She could never know that she was going to be an aunt. That this little one would be her niece or nephew.

A fresh wave of grief washed over me as I sank onto the floor and hugged my knees to my chest.

What was I hoping for? That he’d walk back in the door? That he’d hold my hand? That he’d hug me and tell me that everything would be okay? That, even though I was going to go at it alone, I would be a good mom?

I was seriously losing my mind.

Logan owed me as much as I owed him.

Absolutely nothing.

And maybe that’s what hurt the most.

My phone buzzed atop the kitchen table. I scrambled up and darted for it, holding on to the false hope that it was Logan.

Kylie.

I wiped my eyes and nose with my sleeve and tried to steady my voice. “Hello?”

“Hey,” she said. “Bryan and I are leaving Kristin’s house. I wanted to see if you needed anything before we head home.”

I sniffed.

“Leah?”

“Sorry,” I said with a deep sigh. “Bad night. I’m fine, though.”

“Bad nights must be a trend today,” she said. “Logan’s party was a bust.”

Guilt boiled inside me. “That sucks.”

“Yeah. I think it hurt Kristin more than Lo. He’s changed so much since he got out of college. I feel like he was just waiting for the day he could finally get out of here and pull away. I guess I can’t blame him.”

More tears slipped down my cheeks.

Every time she talked about how much Logan hated it here, how much he had changed, and how different he was, it drove the knife in deeper. I couldn’t reconcile my selfish desire with the selfless need to bear the burden of what we had done together on my own.

“I hope his birthday was good,” I rasped.

“Hopefully, he’ll get his head out of his ass before he goes back to Chicago tomorrow,” Kylie said. “He disappeared in the middle of the party and then came back with an attitude. It’s whatever. I’m over it.” She sighed. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to dump that on you. I was calling to see if you needed anything, not to unload family drama on you. Want me to find some mashed potatoes and bring them by your place?”