Page 48 of Chasing Forever

Letting out a frustrated sigh, I pushed the file away and pinched the bridge of my nose. The muscles in my shoulders and back had started to ache, and when I looked at the clock on the microwave, I discovered it was because I’d been sitting in the same position for hours. The legs of the chair creaked as I pushed back from the table and stood.

Merritt tended to lose track of time when she was immersed in a restoration project. It wasn’t unheard of for her to go a whole day without eating and not realize it, so instead of letting that magnetic pull between us carry me into the garage, I made my way into the kitchen and opened the fridge, scanning everything inside, hoping to get an idea of what to make her for lunch.

When I’d been content in my bachelor lifestyle, my fridge and cupboards were usually running low. I mainly survived on takeout and whatever Blythe cooked and froze for me whenever she took pity on me or worried about my poor eating habits. But since she and Levi moved in, the fridge and pantry were always stocked, and I certainly didn’t miss the days when I’d pull it open to find a single bottle of mustard and a carton of expired milk.

That wasn’t the only change in this house over the past few months, and as I gave myself time to take it all in, I realized everything she or Levi had done had been an improvement. Their personalities were tucked into every corner, from whatever book Merritt was currently reading sitting on the coffee table, to her favorite throw blanket tossed over the back of the couch so she could wrap it around her the next time she sat down.

I had throw pillows and framed pictures scattered about now. Merritt has taken precious memories we’d made together and printed them so we could see them every time we walked by. There was a picture of Levi and Doc on the bookshelf behind the couch. One of Merritt with her little guy sitting on the porch swing at Blythe’s, eating ice cream cones, sat on a side table. She’d printed out a selfie I took of the three of us the day we let Levi talk us into dressing up like wrestlers, using nothing but items we had lying around the house, and displayed it proudly on the mantel. There were pictures of Blythe and her family, of my sister and Merritt posing together, of so many incredible moments. But the one on the fireplace would always be my favorite. And I wanted it to stay there forever.

Hell, even the random wrestling figures I found on the floor were better than the cold, boring nothing that had been there before.

They’d come in and breathed life into this house, and I couldn’t imagine ever losing it. The thought of them leaving one day made me sick to my stomach. I didn’t want things going back to how they’d once been. That was no longer the life I wanted.

My culinary expertise was limited to a few dishes, so I decided to recreate the first thing she’d ever cooked in this kitchen.

I carried a plate in one hand and a glass of iced tea in the other as I headed for the garage. Merritt stood with her back to me, her hips doing a little shimmy to the song playing from the Bluetooth speaker on the shelf as she took her sanding block after an armoire that had definitely seen better days. When I’d asked what she had planned for the piece of furniture, she didn’t know. She’d just known shehadto buy it when she saw it.

As long as she was passionate about it and it made her happy, she could fill every inch of the house with old, damaged furniture in need of a little TLC.

She was wearing a pair of frayed, faded denim shorts and one of my old T-shirts she’d gathered and tied in a knot at the small of her back, leaving the smallest sliver of skin between the waistband and hem showing. The sight of her in my clothes went straight to my dick, and my erection strained against the fly of my jeans. This was something I could see every day—that Iwantedto see every day—and never get tired of it.

She spun around when I cleared my throat to announce my presence. She smiled, and like always, the beauty of it stole my breath. It brightened further when she saw what I was holding. She let out a little squeak and hopped in place. “Grilled cheese with tomato?”

I grinned in return. “Is there any other way to eat it?”

She skipped over and took the plate, popping up on the tips of her toes to press a kiss to the corner of my mouth. “Thanks, honey. I didn’t realize I was hungry until I saw you holding that sandwich.”

I sat the glass down on the workbench and moved closer to inspect the armoire. “How’s it going in here?”

“Great,” she chirped from around the huge bite she’d taken, her cheeks puffing out like an adorable chipmunk. She swallowed and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. “I’ve got a few ideas in my head of what I want to do for this piece, but there’s still a lot that needs to be done before I can think about stain or paint.”

I took in her expression. The flush of her cheeks and the way her eyes shone. “You really love doing this, huh?”

She shrugged a shoulder. “It’s like therapy for me. Puts me at ease.”

I moved to her and rested my hands on her hips. It was impossible to be in the same room as her and not touch her. I skimmed my palms to her waist, grinning at the squeak of surprise when I lifted her and sat her down on top of the old dresser she’d been leaning against. The garage was steadily filling up with more furniture she wanted to work on, and it wouldn’t be long before she ran out of space, but I’d already been brainstorming ideas on how to remedy that.

I pushed her knees apart and stepped between her thighs, getting as close as possible. “Good, baby. I’m glad it does that for you.”

Those fathomless green eyes studied me intensely before she spoke again. “Speaking of being put at ease... how can I help you move past what happened yesterday?”

I inhaled deeply, filling my lungs with the scent of orange peels and burnt sugar. I dropped my head into the crook of her neck and relished the way she gently dragged her fingernails up and down the ridges of my spine.

This was all I needed. Just being near her helped to calm the storm inside me.

“You’re doin’ it. This, right here, is all I need.”

She made a humming noise in the back of her throat before tangling her fingers in my hair and using her hold to tilt my head back to meet her eyes. “That’s not true, and we both know it. Tristan, you’ve been watching my every move since we got home yesterday. You might think you’re hiding it, but you’re wrong. I know you didn’t sleep last night because you spent the entire night watching over me.”

“I can’t help it,” I admitted quietly, the words struggling to move past the knot that had formed in my throat. The idea of something happening to you...” I clenched my eyes closed, unable to finish that thought.

Her fingers ghosted over my forehead and down my temple in the most soothing touch. “Hey,” she whispered. “Look at me.”

I forced my eyes open and back to hers. “I know you want to protect me from the world, but you’re setting yourself up for failure, honey. Life’s unpredictable. There’s no way for you to know what the future holds. If you spend all your time focused on what-ifs and worrying about whatcouldhappen, you’re going to miss all the great stuff that’s happening right in front of you. I can’t stop you from worrying about me, but I want you to know I’m not the same woman I was when we first met. Even if something bad happens to me, I’m strong enough to handle it. I’m strong enough to fight whatever it is and make it back to you.”

She was right. I knew that. Just like I knew her strength was unmatched. She was the bravest person I knew, and that bravery was one of the things I loved most about her. But I was still trying to wrap my brain around all these new feelings she evoked in me.

“This is all so new to me. I’ve never felt for anyone the way I feel for you. It’s so big, so... important, that sometimes it feels like it could consume me if I let it.”

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