Page 40 of Dagger

“Need security here, Atlas. Now,” I rasped.

“Already got two men at the entrance,” he informed me. “Tex and Maze have orders to be there by seven, and they’ll guard her door. D’ya know when Layla’s comin’ home?”

“No. But I don’t care if she’s in here for weeks. I want at least three men here at all times.”

“Won’t be easy, Prez. Gotta lot goin’ on. The boys have trainin’ schedules as well as tryin’a keep on top of work and club business. I’ll get Abe to look at the rosters, see if we can sort somethin’.”

I brought a hand up to rub at the ache in my chest. “They’re so fuckin’ tiny, Atlas. The thought of anyone hurtin’ them brings me to my knees.”

There was a brief pause before Atlas muttered, “Leave it with me. I’ll talk to a few of the men and see if they wanna help us out. Reckon Fender will, and Billy. While Colt’s here, we should put him to use, too.”

“Do it, and at the next meetin’, we need to have a powwow about gettin’ Billy patched in ASAP. The kid’s more than earned it, and I reckon the club needs a good party with all the bullshit swirlin’. The boys need to blow off some steam.”

“Sounds fuckin’ marvelous!” the SAA exclaimed. “You know me, love a good shindig. I’ll get Cara and Iris on it.”

“Remember, we need to keep it on the down-low,” I reminded him as I heard the sound of a door clicking. I craned my neck to see Elise appear in the corridor, and my heart lurched. “Later.” Disconnecting the call, my eyes remained on Elise. “You okay?”

“Sorry to interrupt,” she murmured. “I was worried, but I didn’t mean to eavesdrop. Are you okay?” Elise’s jade-green gaze sucked me in so completely that, without a thought, I steppedforward and reached out a hand to cup her face the same way I used to back when she was mine.

The instant I touched her, my heart gave a kick, and a warm shiver ran through me.

Her skin felt familiar but also new. My Leesy was a woman now, with a courageous heart and an inner strength that put mine to shame. Fuck me for thinking she couldn’t handle the life, and fuck me for thinking she was weak

She was goddamned perfect.

“Never apologize to me again,” I rasped. “Christ, Leesy, it’s me who owes you a lifetime of apologies. I’m sorry for givin’ up at the first hurdle. I’m sorry for not seein’ what was happenin’ right under my fuckin’ nose. Most of all, I’m sorry for leaving you out there swingin’ with no backup. I’d never let one of my men handle shit solo, so I could kick my own ass for turnin’ my back on you.” I leaned down so our faces were close. “You’re a good woman and a fuckin’ incredible mother. You’re everythin’ I knew you’d be. Damnit, you’re more.”

My woman’s eyes rounded, and I watched as tears filled her beautiful green orbs.

“I gotta lot to make up for, baby,” I whispered, thumb skating over the soft skin of her cheek. “But I’m up for the job. Give me a chance to make it right, Leesy. Please?”

She stared at me for what seemed like an eon. Her lush, pink lips opened slightly, an array of emotions moving across her face. Suddenly, her eyes blanked, and she jerked away from my touch and whispered, “No, John.”

The gut punch landed dead on target, and I flinched.

“I loved you so much,” she breathed. “I would’ve done anything for you. Being married to Robert felt so wrong that I wanted to die. If it wasn’t for Const—” her voice faltered “—If it wasn’t for Sophie, I would’ve wasted away because death was preferable to being withhim.”

“Baby,” I murmured. “It was that way for me too. I loved Adele but like a friend ‘cause I never stopped beinginlove with you.”

She stared at me, the hurt radiating from her pretty green eyes.

Like always, the feeling between us was tangible. Elise was the moon, and I was the Earth, and we were pulled together by a force of gravity that had sparked to life the very first time we locked eyes. She’d been mine since she was eighteen years old. She had to feel it, too.

She shook her head. “I don’t believe you, John. I don’t believe in anything anymore. All love’s ever done is shredded me. Why would I want to subject myself to more pain? Don’t you think I’ve had enough?” A lone tear tracked down her cheek.

My heart plummeted.

I clasped her shoulder and croaked, “Leesy—”

She shoved my hand away and swiped at her face, biting out an exasperated, “Stop.”

My heart raced, and a burning fire trailed up my gullet. My voice, when it came, was a rasp. “You don’t mean that, baby.”

“I do, John. I mean every word,” she declared. “We’re different people. You’re vibrant and warm because you’re surrounded by family. I’m cold because nobody’s loved me like that since you.” She jerked a thumb toward the room we’d just exited. “The beauty in there, it doesn’t belong to me. It’s yours, and I’m just an interloper because that’s how we made it. To this day, it kills me, because every time I see you with the family that should’ve been mine, I want to slap you silly. There’s so much resentment in me. I can feel it eating away everything good.”

My gut churned at the pain in her voice. “I can give them to you, Leesy. I’ll give you anythin’. My family’s yours. It’s not too late.”

“That ship sailed years ago,” she argued. “I’m too old to have more children. Still, I’m grateful for Sophie, Atlas, and Belle. They’re who I need to focus on now.”

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