Page 98 of Dagger

Years ago, I used to worry that John would always put the club first—even over me—and I accepted it because that was how Bandit did things, but I could clearly see those fears were unfounded.

My eyes had been opened. The Speed Demons were all about family. They worked hard for what they had, and their successes were plentiful because they wanted the club to succeed without being on the wrong side of the law.

I knew they weren’t choir boys, but they only crossed a line when it was warranted. They had morals and high standards, and they fought to uphold them because they believed in the greater good.

Over the weeks, my resentment seemed to have faded.

How could I continue being angry when beautiful little girls sang, danced, and gave me hugs while calling me Duchess in their sweet little voices? Or when my granddaughter stared up at me with her big, dark eyes and gurgled happily when I whispered how much I loved her. Anger didn’t belong in a sisterhood that was so strong and supportive. It was the furthest thing from my mind when I watched John dance with his granddaughters’ feet resting on his while he walked themaround, or when he talked to Kai for hours about family and legacy.

The club and the people in it were burrowing under my skin and making themselves important in ways I hadn’t experienced since my parents died or when John was sent to Kuwait.

I loved it, I did, but it was also terrifying, because underneath it all, I couldn’t help waiting for it all to be ripped away, leaving me empty, just like last time.

Something inside me wasn’t right.

The fear was eating away at me like a cancer, and I didn’t know how to relieve it.

But at that moment, I could push my misgivings down to a place where I didn’t need to think about them. I was at a wedding, dressed to the nines, and dancing with my beautiful daughter and the girls I’d seemed to have adopted along the way.

There was no room for doubt, at least until tomorrow.

“Come On Eileen’ faded, and a low beat began to thud through the speakers.

Tristan’s hands flew to his mouth. “I love this song!” he cried, bending forward at the waist, eyes to the floor, pumping his fists downward, Tina Turner style, as a sweet voice started chanting about ‘all the single ladies.’

Sophie grabbed my hand, and we swayed our hips in time to the song.

Kady and Sunshine came flying over and began to dance in a line behind Tristan, copying his moves.

“I loves this!” Sunshine exclaimed, pumping her fists to the ground, her beautiful long hair flying out around her.

Kady stooped lower, eyes to the dance floor, and she wiggled her ass for all she was worth, her arms going crazy as she punched low.

A bubble of laughter rose through my throat.

Kennedy materialized into our dance circle as the chorus came on, and my giggle burst free as I watched her stick her ring finger out, twisting it just as Beyonce warbled how, if her man liked it, then he most definitely should’ve put a ring on it.

Sophie stuck her hand out, Layla, Cara, and Anna following suit, twisting their ring fingers in a circle.

I laughed, holding my hand out and doing the same in time to the music.

Tristan joined us with the girls, and we all danced in a big circle, roaring with laughter while twisting our ring fingers to Beyonce’s soulful voice blaring from the speakers.

My heart filled with joy, and I couldn’t wipe the sappy grin from my face.

Every wedding I’d attended for the last thirty years had been held at country clubs and resorts and had been aesthetically beautiful. But none of their beauty came close to earlier that day, when Kit cried as Kennedy declared, “I do.” Or how he’d picked Kady up, rested her on his hip, and buried his face in her throat when Abe pronounced them man and wife.

Kit’s adoration for his family was other-worldly. I could feel how connected they were, and how their love transcended time. John always used to say he believed we’d found each other time and time again in every life we’d ever lived, and I’d agreed, because I felt the same way, down to my bones.

And it was the same way with Kit, Kennedy and their beautiful twins.

Kennedy, ridiculously smart, sassy and strong with a heart of gold and a yearning to make the world better for her kids. Kady was sweet and sensitive, and just like her mom, she wanted the best for everybody. Kit, the beautiful man who was damaged but also whole because his woman and kids accepted every part of him, even the darker ones. Then the handsome, brooding, Kai,world-weary at the age of nine, whose love for his family ran so deep that it was part of his DNA.

In the eyes of the law and God, they finally belonged to each other.

And it was perfect.

An hour later, we were all at the bar, having a deep and meaningful conversation.

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