Page 69 of Lime Tree Hill

“Apparently. Seems I’m the only one who’s not. I guess that’s me—old-fashioned Tayla. She said they have strong sexual chemistry, but she doesn’t want a full-on relationship.”

“Does that make you sad…knowing they have that chemistry?”

Frown lines tracked across her forehead. Mitch waited for her to reply, to confide.

“It’s something we never explored. We were waiting until after the wedding.”

Hayden’s ‘virgin bride’ comment flashed through his mind again. “So, you guys never…?”

Tayla shook her head. Broke eye contact. Mitch wanted toreach out—to hold her—but it wasn’t the right time. He didn’t want to confuse her. She had to come to him on her own terms.

“I don’t know why. Maybe he didn’t love me after all.”

“I doubt that’s true,” he said gently. “He flew from Sydney to woo you back. I’m sure he loves you a great deal.”

“Or the thought of me perhaps—pure and untouched.” She pulled a tissue from the pack and blew her nose. “Looking back, I can’t believe I went along with it…our ‘intellectual relationship’ as he called it.”

Mitch wanted to ask the obvious question but decided against it in case he’d misinterpreted her meaning. Surely she’d had boyfriends at university? He’d heard of the born-again virgin movement, thought it was ridiculous. You were either a virgin or you weren’t, but maybe Tayla had been celibate since meeting Hayden.

“When he turned up unannounced, I was terrified. Not of him, but of my own feelings—scared I’d look at him and that love-light filter would be as strong as ever.”

He waited. When she didn’t continue, he took his cue. “And is it?”

“No.” She looked at him now, the half-hearted smile on her lips not making it to her eyes. “In a way, that shocked me. That feeling of being free from his…control is the wrong word, but I’m tired and can’t think straight.”

Having felt the same way when he finished with Prue, Mitch understood. “I get it.”

“Anyway, I’d better go to bed. Thanks for the ear. I’m sorry I’ve been distant, but those first few months I questioned every decision I’d ever made, wondering why I wasn’t good enough. And as the weeks passed, I sometimes forgot the person I’d spent months investing my time in wasn’t there anymore.”

“You mean Hayden?”

Tayla nodded.

“I understand. It took me a long time to get over Prue.”

“What happened…with you and Prue?”

“Same shit, different scenario.” He leaned his head back and sighed. “I thought I’d miss her much more than I did…I do. And I did at first. Now, I’m just relieved it’s over.”

“Are you saying that she cheated?”

“Yeah, and spectacularly. It seems threesomes were the flavor of the month back then. Luckily, I didn’t know the other two guys. I tried to get over it—forgive her—but in the end, I’d lost that trust.”

They stayed silent for a few moments. Mitch wished she would slip into bed with him, for them to make love and shut the world out for a while.

“If you want to go back to Sydney, I won’t stand in your way. Now the sale’s been finalized, I can tell Ken you’ve got work commitments there.”

Tayla buried her face in her hands. When she finally looked at him, he knew he’d said the wrong thing. It hadn’t occurred to him she might want to stay, no matter what she’d told Hayden.

“Thanks.” She stood and folded the throw, then placed it over the end of the bed. “But I need to be here for Mum and Dad.”

He reached out, offering his hand. “Hey, come here.”

Tayla glanced toward the door, her hesitation giving Mitch a small ray of hope. She looked back, shaking her head. “I’m sorry. I can’t. Not tonight.”

Freedom. Such a strange concept. Something people often longed for from the security of a stable yet stale relationship. But freedom comes in many forms, and without love and friendship, freedom easily slips into loneliness.

Tayla returned to her bedroom and shut the door. She’d known that Hayden would crash back into her life at some stage. He seldom took no for an answer. And while waging a vendettawasn’t his style, Hayden had no difficulty in getting his point across.