Page 30 of Savage Union

“If you mean Cass, no. He hasn’t said anything to me,” I said. “Several other crew members have though—mainly those thathave to sit by you in the mess hall. I thought I made it clear about the mandatory shower time we have aboard The Illyrian.”

“I attended the shower time,” he protested. “I was there in the shower room—ask anyone!”

“You don’t look or smell like you showered,” I pointed out. “And your uniform is a disgrace. Why is it crumpled and stained already when you just got it yesterday?” I nodded at what looked like spilled juice on his shirt and the smears of dark purpletilberryjam on his white cuffs.

Gurflug’s face grew darker.

“That’s not my fault! It’s too crowded in the mess hall! Someone spilled juice on me.”

“And I suppose that same person dragged your cuffs through the food on your tray and got crumbs all over your shirt too?” I asked, raising my eyebrows.

“They—” he began, but I was sick of his excuses.

“I’m going to order you to leave the bridge right now and throw your uniform in the steam-cleaner at once,” I told him. “And tonight you’ll take a proper shower and actually getclean.”

“But Iamclean—as clean as a Galafruxian is meant to be. Our slime?—”

“Is not welcome aboard my ship and especially not all over The Illyrian’s navigation equipment,” I finished for him crisply. “Now go get your uniform cleaned.”

Gurflug’s eyes bulged angrily.

“Excuse me, Captain, but thatshouldn’tbe my job.”

I raised my eyebrows in disbelief.

“It shouldn’t be your job to keep yourself clean?”

“I’m talking about my uniform,” Gurflug protested. “On other ships I’ve worked on, the navigator’s uniform is cleanedfor himevery night. Why not have the cabin boy do it?”

“Snuffy has a lot of responsibilities but keeping track ofyouruniform is not one of them,” I told him.

“Itshouldbe,” Gurflug argued. “And another thing—the cook—Cookie, I believe his name is—has outright refused my menu request for Galafruxian slime stew.”

I couldn’t fucking believe his entitlement. I wanted to bare my fangs but I held myself back.

“So now you’re asking the cook to make you a whole separate menu?”

“Not at all—I’m sure the rest of the crew would enjoy it as well. It’s extremely delicious and nutritious,” he said loftily. “I have the recipe which I’ll be happy to provide to him as soon as you have a talk with him.”

“I’mnotasking Cookie to make something special just for you,” I growled. At this point I was barely holding on to my temper. I’d always heard that Galafruxians could be prima donnas but this was getting completely out of hand!

“This is ridiculous!” Gurflug exclaimed. “Iam the navigator aboard this ship. Without me, you’re not going anywhere!”

“So you think that means the entire crew should cater to your every whim, is that it?” I asked, keeping my temper in check by the thinnest of margins.

“Well…yes.” He nodded firmly. “The ship’s navigator is arguably the most important crew member on board.”

“You’re forgetting that you’renotthe only navigator I hired for this mission, Gurflug,” I told him.

“Yes, but I’m the only one who counts!” he snapped. “That pup you hired is useless! Why, he gets worm hole sickness! He threw up all over one of the other crew members at dinner last night!”

“I heard all about it, but I’m not talking about Cass—I’m talking aboutyou,”I told him. “Go get yourself cleaned up and don’tevercome back up to my bridge looking and smelling like you do right now. Do I make myself clear?”

“But—”

“Do I make myself clear,Navigator?” I growled, allowing my voice to dip menacingly low. “We have a brig aboard The Illyrian, you know,” I added. “Let me know if you’d rather cool your heels in there than the navigators’ bunk.”

Gurflug gave me a furious look but it was clear he’d finally taken my words to heart.

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