Page 94 of The Drummer's Heart

“It is.”

“We made a baby? Together?”

“That’s how it works.” She laughed.

“This isn’t a dream…”

She shook her head. “No.”

My hands trembled as I lifted them to her face. “Holy shit.”

“I know.”

I kissed her forehead. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. I mean, I’ve been in shock since I took the test. Well,tests. All twelve of them.”

“This is really happening?”

“I think so. I haven’t seen a doctor yet. And I know that’s bad considering I’m already showing.”

I lowered my hands to her belly again, placing my palms against it. “My God. Look at you with my baby inside of you.”

“It’s bad timing. You’re about to go on tour and—”

“Fuck the tour! This is thebestthing that’s ever happened to me.”

“I don’t feel ready. I don’t know anything about babies. You saw what a fish out of water I was around Christian. I don’t know what I’m doing. I might’ve killed him if you weren’t—”

“Don’t worry. You’re gonna do amazing. And I have a little experience I can share when it comes to kids. How long are you here with me?”

She shrugged. “I have no plan. I just booked a flight here as soon as I found out. I wanted to tell you in person.”

“How can I leave you like this?” I shook my head. “I can’t go. I can’t go on tour.”

“What choice do you have?”

“Come with me. Come with me on tour,” I begged. “Please.”

“I can’t do that, Atticus.”

“I don’t want you to be pregnant and alone. I want you with me, where I can take care of you when we’re not performing.”

“You think being pregnant on a rock tour is going to be a positive experience?”

That made me realize how ridiculous it was to expect that. “Okay, maybe that doesn’t make much sense. But selfishly…I want to see your belly grow. I want to experience every moment of this.” Closing my eyes, I pressed my forehead to hers. “But shit, I know it’s not ideal. I can’t force you. You have to do what feels right for you.” My skin tingled with excitement. “We should go see a doctor while you’re here.”

“I don’t think I’d be able to get an appointment that fast.”

“Doug’s wife just had a baby. I can find out who she sees. Maybe they can get us in.”

“Okay. I mean, if you think that’s doable.”

“You should have a doctor out here anyway.” Not wanting to sound presumptuous, I added, “It’ll be good for you to have a doctor onbothcoasts for when you’re…visiting.” I knelt and placed my cheek against her stomach. “I didn’t want to go on tour before this. But now? The last thing I want to do is leave you.” I looked up at her. “Tell me I’m not dreaming. It still feels like I’m about to wake up any second.”

She ran her fingers through my hair. “It’s real, Atticus.”

“How the hell am I gonna concentrate on my performances, knowing you’re out there with my baby inside you?”

---