Page 52 of The Drummer's Heart

Her question gave me pause, because the last time we were together, I was pretty sure she wasn’t quite legally able to drink.But she was most definitely old enough now. “Absolutely I do.” I smiled. “Is red okay?”

“That’s perfect.”

“That’s your uncle’s favorite. So that’s what we have.” I took out a bottle and poured us each a glass.

I handed her one and sat down across from her. “It feels weird to be drinking wine with you.”

“Yeah, well, a lot of time has passed, hasn’t it?”

“Are you still living at your mom’s?” I asked.

“Kieran and I have an apartment in town now. Kyle is the only one still living at home.”

I took a sip. “What are you, twenty-three now?”

“Twenty-four.” She sighed. “Yup. Getting old.”

“Hush…” I laughed, gliding my finger along the stem of my glass. “Listen, I just want to get something out of the way.”

“Okay…”

“I feel really guilty for not communicating with you all this time. What happened between Atticus and me wasn’t your fault, and you shouldn’t have had to pay for it. I’m sorry I didn’t keep in touch after he and I split.”

Kenzie shook her head. “Everyone in the family understands why you had to leave. And what happened was very difficult for all of us to accept at first.”

“I know. I just…I’ve missed you. Your mom, too. And your brothers. All of you. You were my family. And I’m sorry.”

“I did always see you as a big sister. I’m not gonna lie. It was difficult. But I never blamed you, you know?”

“Do they all hate me deep down? Your mom and the boys?”

“For what?”

“Any number of things. Not sticking by Atticus. And…well, I’m sure you heard about Julian and me, right?” I hated bringing it up, but I owed her the truth at this point.

“That was definitely surprising. Out of all the men in the world, I don’t understand why you had to choose him, but…”

I could see disappointment in her eyes.

“Your reaction is fair. I know it seems hard to believe.” I paused. “Julian found me in a very bad state one night. He wasn’t trying to pursue me. We literally ran into each other in the city. Nothing turned romantic between us for a long time.” I took a long sip of wine. “Then I heard some rumors about your uncle. It shouldn’t have bothered me so much, because we were divorced, but it did. It still felt like a betrayal, even if I knew my leaving was what had caused him to spiral. During that time, I became closer to Julian. He cared about me, and in some ways, I grew to care about him. But if I’m being honest, I knew I was only with him to try to forget about Atticus.”

She nodded. “Are you still with Julian?”

“No.” I shook my head. “I ended things.”

“How did he take it?”

“Not well. He says he fell in love with me and wants me to consider getting back together. He came to Monksville to try to talk me into giving things a second chance. Atticus and he got into it last week.”

“Oh my gosh. What a mess.”

“Atticus tracked him down at the bar, and things got a bit ugly. Thankfully, no one got hurt.”

“Well, Julian may care for you, but he should know that you and Atticus are soulmates. The fact that you’re not together doesn’t change that.”

My eyes widened. She seemed completely confident in what she’d said. Maybe that’s why I could never seem to feel at peace—because life had ripped me away from my soulmate, and every day since had been about trying to find my way back to him. “The truth is, Kenzie, I live with a lot of regret about how Ihandled the situation. I’m not proud of it. There are many things I would do differently, if I could go back in time.”

“Like what?”

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