Page 34 of The Drummer's Heart

“Can you pick up some wine while you’re out?”

“Any particular kind?”

She wriggled her brows. “Surprise me.”

I smiled.Surprise me.That was something she’d always said when we were together. I’d loved surprising her with a hell of a lot more than just wine. And there she was being playful with me again. Definitely not my imagination.

Later, after I returned with the weed and wine, I realized why Nicole had wanted me out of the kitchen. The aroma had given it away. Her white chicken chili—and the only thing she ever cooked—was fantastic.

I leaned over to see inside the pot. “This is for me?”

She dug her elbow into my side. “Who else?”

“Wow. Thank you.”

“Well, you’ve given up your life for two weeks to be here. It’s the least I can do.”

I wanted to tell her I had no life without her, that there was no place I’d rather be than this little house with her, that I’d give everything up in a second to do life with her again.

But instead, I said, “This wasn’t necessary. But I appreciate it.”

We brought the pot of chili and some bowls into Mimi’s room and enjoyed a quiet dinner.

Afterward, I helped adjust Mimi forward so she could smoke her joint. Unfortunately, when we tried to have her sit up in a chair a little while later, her pain hadn’t subsided. Ronan’s success seemed to be a fluke.

After Nicole and I helped Mimi back into bed and left her to sleep, I lifted a spare joint from my pocket.

“What’s that?” she asked as we walked back to the kitchen.

“It’s for us. Let’s go out back and smoke it.”

She shook her head. “I don’t know.”

“Come on, Nicole. Everyone’s doing it,” I teased. “Even your ninety-three-year-old grandmother.”

“Not a good idea. I need my inhibitions around you. And I have to be careful.”

That comment pleased me. I loved the thought of her losing her inhibitions. Even better? Maybe she’d magically lose her memory of the bad stuff.

“You had four drinks when we went out and managed to survive. This is safer than alcohol. It will just relax you. You won’t lose your mind.”

“Okay…” She exhaled. “I suppose sharing one joint won’t kill me.”

We went outside to the yard and sat across from each other in the two Adirondack chairs. It was a cool night, and when I noticed her shivering, I took off my hoodie and placed it over her shoulders.

“Thank you.” She wrapped it around herself.

I lit the joint, and we began passing it back and forth. It was quiet aside from the sound of crickets. After a few hits, Nicole seemed to relax into her chair. I was happy that she was letting her guard down.

“The other night…” she said. “I was telling Emily about how we met. I hadn’t allowed my mind to go back to those days in a very long time.”

I blew out some smoke before passing the joint to her. “It’s funny you say that because I did the same recently…with my therapist.”

“Really?” She took a puff and handed it back to me.

“Yeah. The first thing I thought of was sixteen-year-old you on the nasty couch in Cassius’s basement, watching us jam. That’s the first memory I have of you. I’ll never forget the first time I saw you. I thought you were the most beautiful girl in the world.” I glanced over at her. “Still do.”

She took one last hit, then passed it to me. “Well, you never would’ve pursued me in the first place if I hadn’t freaked out when you brought a girl to the basement. I was so damn jealous. Do you remember what I did?”

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