Page 68 of Knot Just A Fan

Ugh. Every time I think of this, it makes me sick to my stomach. How could we? I couldI?

I know our dicks get in the way of our brains—all of us. All Alphas I’ve ever known. And Ronan maybe just wanted to get on with getting it on, with the one we were meant to be matched with. Sick of waiting. I get that.

But also, I never felt that urge for Willow, the few times she was around. I never felt she was right for us. But Grayson seemed so set. Who was I to argue over our leader’s choice?

Maybe I should have. But I fucking hate arguing.

We reach the train station and Briella snaps dozens of photos. She’s brought a smaller camera, not the one she used at our gigs, but it’s magic to watch her go to work, every movement seeming like a dance of turns and angles and raising and lowering and shifting to frame the scenes. She’s like music in form and movement, like a choreographed piece of art herself, her bright pink hair hanging down her shoulders, tucked behind one ear.

I could watch her forever. And that’s when I know. Iknow.

I pull Grayson aside as we step across to the boards to check the train time. Cami’s standing over my shoulder, clearly waiting for some interesting conversation.

“Mate. She’s it.”

Grayson looks at the board intently then turns to me, and flicks his eyes at Cami. “She is. She fucking is. Willow’s at it, though. We’ll have a band meeting once Ronan is back but I’ve told him she’s threatening a lawyer.”

“Lawyer? For what? We never signed anything.”

“She claims that my emails and texts over time amount to a common-law pack promise. But she hasn’t said yet what she thinks we owe her.”

I roll my eyes. “I knew she was trouble but I did not realize just how much.”

Grayson shakes his head. I can see the anger and resentment in his eyes. And I know it’s all aimed at himself. I can’t let that stand.

“Dude, though, check yourself. This isn’t on you. You didn’t know she’d do this. She was a total bitch when?—”

“Um, just so you know, I could’ve told you that ages ago, but you guys seem to think that Omegas are thin on the ground. You know we’re everywhere, right?” Cami’s looking at us with her arms crossed, but eyes wide. “You were not stuck with her. You loved her as kids, okay, so what? You’re adults now. You have eyes. You saw that one—” She nods at Briella. “And you knew.” Her voice’s dropped low and she stares at Grayson. “You should’ve tried harder.”

“Hey, Ronan told me?—”

Cami widens her eyes and shakes her head. Briella stows her camera and joins us, cheeks still flushed. She looks up at the train coming into the platform. “Is this us?”

“Sure is,” says Grayson quickly. He takes her hand and Cami and I fall in behind them as we climb onboard.

Soon we’re settled in an upstairs compartment on the 10:30 train to Nice.

For the first two hours, I sleep, curled up against one window. When I open my eyes, Cami and Briella are leaning on one another, each with headphones on, and Grayson’s gone, probably to the bar. The compartment door is shut and the ride is quiet. I blink and blearily watch the landscape flash by.

I heave a sigh. I pull a hoodie from my bag over my head.

“Freezing, isn’t it?” says Cami loudly, looking up. I nod and she pulls her headphones off.

“AC is cranked. Though that means it’s probably going to be another hot day out there. Absolutely my preference.”

“Hot on the outside, cold on the inside?” Cami raises a brow and grins.

“Absolutely.”

Grayson returns with four coffees and we all thank him. Briella removes her headphones and is noticeably twitching her knees together on the seat. Her brows are furrowed and her lips pinched.

“You okay there, mate?” I ask. But the second it comes out of my mouth, I know she’s not.

She shakes her head, eyes wide but forces her lips into a pained smile.

Cami slides aside on the seat to look her friend in the face. She holds the back of her ring-laden hand to her friend’s forehead, pushing the pink fringe away. “Oh dear. Okay. I think we might need to, ah—” She exchanges a glance with Grayson. He looks at me then gestures at Briella with his head.

Shit.

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