Page 50 of Lock Me Out

You’re going to die, bitch. Count the minutes before it’s all over.

“What the fuck?” I hold it out for Nix to read and watch rage settle over his features.

“But they’re dead!” Leni sobs behind her hands, rocking back and forth. “How? How are they doing this?”

“They’re just assholes behind a keyboard,” Nix murmurs, though the look he gives me from over the top of her head isn’t nearly as comforting as he’s trying to be. “Nobody’s going to hurt you.”

“I don’t understand! What did I ever do?” When I sit on her other side, she looks at me through tear-filled eyes. Her face is flushed, her cheeks shining from what’s already flowed down them. “Why are they doing this? I thought it was Deborah. Was I wrong?”

I wish I knew. I thought this part was over, too. I thought for sure she wouldn’t have to deal with this anymore.

“Maybe they had other people helping them,” Nix suggests. “I mean, whoever they are needs to get a fucking life, but that could be it.”

“I bet he’s right.” I use my thumbs to wipe her cheeks, but fresh tears keep coming. “They’re pathetic pieces of shit with nothing better to do than hurt a good person like you.” And I would pay for the opportunity to have them in front of me here and now so they could learn what happens to people who can’t leave well enough alone. I won’t say that to her—she’s upset enough—but the desire burns inside me.

Looking at my brother, I don’t have to guess what’s going through his head. His jaw ticks, and his eyes narrow. It’s amazing there isn’t smoke coming out of his ears. “Who do I have to kill this time?”

“Don’t say that.” Her voice shakes when she turns to him, but there’s a flat firmness to it, too. “Please, don’t ever say that. Iknow you feel that way, but it’s too risky. I don’t want you doing it because of me.”

She doesn’t get it. I don’t expect her to. There is never going to come a time when either of us will be able to stand back and watch her hurt without doing something about it. It’s just not possible. That’s not how we’re built.

“Nix is right.” The arm I put on her trembling body doesn’t seem to help too much, but her breathing does slow down from the way it was before, when it sounded like she might hyperventilate. “They’re assholes behind a keyboard. Cowards. Block and move on. Hell, I’ll do it for you.”

She shakes her head and takes her phone before releasing a deep breath. “No. I’ll do it. You’re right—they’re nothing.” I wish I knew for sure she meant it, that she’s not saying it just to convince us she’s feeling better.

Something tells me microwave popcorn is not going to pull her out of this. There has to be something else we can do to pick up her spirits. “What else would you like to do tonight?” I ask while shooting Nix a look that’s close to panic. There has to be a way we can get her through this.

“Actually, can I ask a favor?” He looks straight at her without acknowledging me. “Would you mind if we went to see Mom? I was only there one time, and she was asleep. I’ve been wanting to ask, but I didn’t want to be needy or anything.”

Damn it, it was the perfect thing to say. Instead of focusing on herself, Leni can think about somebody else and what they need. I should’ve thought of that. I’m supposed to know her so much better than he does.

She perks right up, running a hand under her eyes and nodding. “Sure. That would be great. I guess I should put some regular clothes on,” she adds, looking down at the pajamas I encouraged her to wear.

“Go ahead—we won’t leave without you.” He even gets her to smile before she hurries off to the bedroom.

Blowing out a sigh, I murmur, “That was the right thing to say.”

“Yeah, I thought it would be. Besides, I want to see Mom,” he adds. “I’m dying to see her.”

“We should stop and get her some lilies on the way.” There’s already a plan forming in my head by the time I get up to put some shoes on. Maybe we can pick up food on the way home—hopefully, she’ll be in a better mood by then.

Who the hell is behind these messages? And Leni’s right: what did she ever do to deserve something like this? She’s innocent. She’s never hurt anybody. Maybe once it’s obvious Deborah’s not coming back from wherever she disappeared to, whoever has been getting off on helping her harass Leni will lose interest.

That’s what I need to hold onto as we leave the apartment. We have to be careful—Nix walks with his hood pulled up and his head down while I try to look casual as I scan the area to make sure nobody’s paying attention to us. Will it always be this way? Is there ever going to be a time when we can go back to living life the way we used to?

I know the answer to that question. Life is never going to be the same. All we can do now is make the best of what we have. For me, that means taking care of the girl who is so eager to put herself aside if it means making somebody else happy for a little while.

Nix sits in the back while Leni takes the passenger seat. “She’s going to be so happy to see you,” she tells Nix, and the warmth and excitement in her voice would make me cry if I had it in me. She’s so pure. How could I ever have wanted to hurt her like I did? How could I ever hate her?

“I hope it’s not too much for her,” he murmurs, still with his hood raised. “Seeing me like this. I guess I’ll have to explain it.”

“Keeping it vague will probably be better,” I decide as we leave the parking garage attached to the building. “I mean, I don’t think she could ever handle the whole truth. We can say you had an accident, but you’re okay now.”

“Sure, we’ll back you up,” Leni agrees. “It’ll be fine.”

Traffic’s not too heavy, though I wish everyone would get the hell out of my way. It’s corny, but true: I’m looking forward to watching Mom’s reaction to having us both together like this. It might shock her to see his face, but she’ll get used to it once she sees he’s the same person he always was. We’ll keep it light for her sake.

“Shit.” Thoughts of Mom dissolve into the background when I switch from the gas pedal to the brake as we come up to a yellow light… and the car barely slows down. We end up rolling through the intersection, where a truck’s horn blares as the driver slams to a stop so we don’t collide.

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