Page 50 of Ink & Stardust

I lay tucked into his side for the better part of an hour, watching his chest rise and fall with every breath he took. I swear, I could have watched him forever, but sleep was threatening to take me under, and I didn’t want to be that girl. You know, the one who overstays her welcome.

Not that he gave me any indication that he wanted me to leave. In fact, quite the opposite, really. I expected him to pull out of me, hand me my clothes, and walk me to the door. Instead, he tugged me into his arms and kissed the side of my head, his fingers tracing circles on my bare shoulder until he dozed off several minutes later.

We didn’t talk. Hell, I can’t remember if we spoke a single word, but it didn’t feel weird not to. If anything, it felt right to just live in that moment with him.

But even with how perfect everything was, it wasn’t happiness I felt when I slipped out of his bed just a few short minutes ago. Instead, it was the same nagging anxiety I always feel when I get inside my head. The topic of the night, how not to fall for the most beautiful man on the planet, especially when said man just showed you the most incredible night of your life, giving you a type of pleasure you didn’t even realize existed.

Anytime I heard my friends talk about how good someone was in bed, I thought they were just being polite and saying whatothers expected them to say. I know that’s what I did with Leo. Now I see sex really can bethatgood. No, not just good—life-altering.

I push open the door to my dorm room as quietly as possible, assuming that Charlotte and Maisie are likely already asleep and not wanting to wake either of them for selfish reasons. I just don’t know if I have it in me to answer any questions tonight, at least not where Kai Elliot is concerned.

Tiptoeing across the room, I get all the way to my desk before I hear a throat clear, turning just as a light clicks on behind me to see Maisie is not onlynotsleeping, but she’s sitting up in bed, almost as if she’s been waiting for me.

Great...

“I was wondering if you’d be coming home tonight.” She smiles, but the action doesn’t quite reach her eyes. Eyes, which when I look closer, I can tell are bloodshot and red-rimmed.

She’s been crying.

“Are you okay?” I drop my phone onto the charger before taking a seat at my desk, working on the laces of my shoes.

Kai on his knees in front of me, untying my shoes, flashes in front of my eyes, but I quickly push the memory away. I don’t think I’ll ever look at my shoes and not think of him after tonight.

“Yeah.” Maisie sighs.

“You sure?” I tug off one shoe before moving to the other.

“Men suck.” She lifts her shoulder in a semblance of a shrug.

“What happened?” I prod, already knowing it has something to do with that guy Mac she’s been talking to, though I have yet to actually meet the guy. All I know is that he’s a sophomore and he plays football.

“Nothing. I just think I need to take a break from guys for a while. They just complicate things too much.”

I don’t voice my agreement, but that doesn’t mean I don’t agree. Kai has done nothing but complicate my life since he entered it. And yet, I can’t stop myself from craving him like he’s water and I’m on the cusp of dying of dehydration.

“I get that,” I say instead, glancing up at Charlotte’s bunk after setting my shoes by the side of my desk. “Where’s Char?”

“She stayed at the party with some friends. Not sure if she’s coming back tonight or not.” Her gaze narrows. “Now stop deflecting and tell me howyournight was.” A smirk graces her pretty face.

“It was...” I consider lying. I mean, she’s known Kai for years. I doubt she wants to hear how mind-blowingly amazing he is in bed. “Incredible,” I finally admit, not able to stop a smile from spreading across my lips. “I’m sorry. I know you probably don’t want to hear that, but I just—”

“So you slept with him.” It’s not a question.

I nod slowly, biting down on my bottom lip in an attempt to keep a lock on my emotions. The last thing I want to do is make this a big deal because I know it isn’t. This kind of thing happens to Kai on the daily, I’m sure. The thought instantly sours my mood.

“I know you told me to stay away—” I start.

“Kai isn’t a bad person or anything,” she cuts me off. “And I’m sure he’s a lot of fun, so long as you don’t expect anything from him.”

“I don’t.” The lie sticks on my tongue. I mean, I don’t technically expect anything. Doesn’t mean I don’t want it, though. “So you’re not mad?”

“That you’re finally getting laid?” She snorts out a laugh. “Definitely not mad. Maybe Kai is just what you need to finally shake that dick of an ex of yours.”

“Maybe,” I quietly agree, knowing I already feel different. Don’t get me wrong. It’s going to take a lot more than a night ofgood sex to erase what Leo and Summer put me through, but for the first time since everything happened, I don’t feel sick to my stomach at the thought of them.

“Given the claim he staked on you in front of all the people at the party, which was super-hot, by the way, I’m assuming this isn’t just a one-time thing?”

“Honestly, I have no idea. We agreed not to sleep with other people while we were sleeping with each other, so that makes me feel like maybe it wasn’t just one time.” I’m hesitant to let myself be hopeful because let’s be real... I really hope there’s more, like so much more.

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