Page 38 of Ink & Stardust

It takes me several beats to recognize the warmth of his hands on my face, and even more to take in the concern etched into his features.

I don’t have time to think about how every time I find the ledge, he magically appears to talk me off of it. I don’t have time to consider why he’s here or how he seems to know exactly what to say to coax me back down. And I certainly don’t have time to consider my actions when I lean in and abruptly press my mouth to his.

The second our lips touch, the impending attack subsides, a different sort of panic taking its place. The kind that sinks its nails into me so deeply, I fear I won’t ever be able to free myself, though right now, I don’t think I’ll ever want to.

Not with the way Kai pulls me closer, with the way his hand splays across the small of my back, with the way his tongue teases the seam of my lips, asking for entrance that I happily grant.

And then he’s everywhere. The taste of him. The feel of him. It’s overwhelming. It’s terrifying. It’shot...

He kisses me with expert precision, his tongue lapping mine in a way that has me desperate for more. For him to never stop kissing me. For him to never stop touching me. I could die right now and never want for another thing in my life.

I know that sounds absurd, crazy even, but I can’t stop the desperate way my body craves him.

I plunge my hands into the silky locks of his hair, shamelessly tugging on the ends as I arch my body into him. There’s no outside world. No passersby to watch the exchange. No birds chirping to fill my ears. No sun to warm my skin. There’s only him...

“I warned you...” He groans against my mouth, dragging my lower lip through his teeth, and I whimper, not able to hold the noise in as my body fires on all cylinders that seem to all be trained in one direction, creating a deep ache in my lower belly that feels all-consuming.

“I don’t care,” I murmur, deepening the kiss.

“You should.” His hands slide to my hips and he locks me in place.

I can feel the shift before I allow myself time to process it. Feel him start to pull away no matter how desperate I am to hold on to him.

Kai’s heated gaze meets mine for all of one second before he steps back.

I feel the absence of his toucheverywhere. I shiver as a breeze touches my scorched skin, ice cold despite how warm it is outside.

I blink once. Twice. A third time as the world slowly fades back into focus.

We’re in the middle of campus, in the middle of the day, on full display for anyone to see. My cheeks heat to molten level.

“I... I...” Words fail me.

I hate you. I want you. Why did you stop kissing me? Why did you let me kiss you? Why are you always around? How do you always seem to know where to find me? What do you want from me?

A million questions scatter across my brain, but not a single one makes it to my lips.

My lips... Lips that just seconds ago were pressed to his.

I meet his gaze a second time.

“We can’t do this.” He takes another step back, almost like he doesn’t trust himself not to reach out and touch me again, and trust me, I understand the feeling.

“Because you don’t want me?” I challenge, the kiss awakening something in me I thought had died months ago. A spark I was so sure I no longer possessed.

“Because I do.”

The ground threatens to open up and swallow me whole.

“Then I don’t see the problem.”

“Then you’re not looking hard enough.”

“Why are you so hell-bent on keeping me at arm’s length? We both know it isn’t because you’re worried about your virtue.” It’s a low blow, but I can’t bring myself to regret it.

“Maybe I’m worried about yours.”

“That’s bullshit and we both know it. You want to know what I think? I think you’re toying with me for fun.” It’s an idea I haven’t wanted to entertain, but when the truth is staring you in the face... It’s the only explanation for his behavior. The only thing that makes any real sense.

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