Page 79 of My Darling Mayhem

“I need to tell you something.”

Archer stroked my hair, his lips close to my ear.

“Is it about your brother?”

I froze, even as he pulled me closer. His mouth was still close to my ear as he tried again.

“I already know.”

I pulled away from him and sat up. “What do you mean you already know?”

Archer’s eyes frantically searched my face as he slowly sat beside me.

“This was before our talk about how I couldn’t handle things like an MC president…, but something happened recently on one of our routes. The member who came back mentioned El Peligro and what the new leaders were doing… in addition to our conversation in the truck, it made me suspicious. That day I worked on the fence, it was really sunny out…I had to go find sunscreen for the boys. Cruz mentioned you had a beach bag in your closet.”

“You didn’t.”

He had the decency to look disappointed, even ashamed, but the same feeling slithered through my chest as I pictured him sifting through a box that was so deeply personal to me.

I moved off the bed and started searching for my clothes.

Archer jumped up and moved to stop me. “Wait, I’m sorry, Wren. I know I messed up and should have told you, but I never assumed it would even come up again. I assumed it would just be something I could use to protect you if the time ever came.”

The floor was too dark for me to see where my underwear had landed. My shirt was out on the stairs or near it.

“Wren.” Archer’s tattooed fingers were on my jaw.

I tried to pull away, but he held me.

“Even if I wanted to overlook you invading my privacy, Archer, my issue right now is the fact that you never told me. Did Thistle mention what Saul said to me?” Tears edged into my vision as Archer held me, his own eyes silently begging me to stay with him.

I didn’t wait for him to answer me because it didn’t matter. I’d been waiting all day for this conversation with Archer, and now…it felt like I’d been sucker-punched.

“Saul knew who I was too.”

Headlights flashing from the street below lit up the wall, revealing the dread on Archer’s face.

“I’m sorry he talked to you. I’m sorry I took you somewhere that he could get to you. I’ve been beating myself up all day because I can’t accept that I was right there, and still, you could have been hurt.” His voice cracked.

More headlights beamed through the window.

“I’ve been worrying all this time that…” I paused as the memory of when he braided my hair came back. “You let me tell you about my brother and never said?—"

We shifted, and Archer had me back on the bed, cautious and careful as he settled beside me.

“You never said, Wren. I was the one who had initially asked you about all this, and you lied to me. You lied about your name and your connection. Even when we talked about your brother, you chose not to tell me. So, as much as you’re hurt about me finding out, I’m equally hurt that you didn’t tell me on your own.”

I shook my head, my eyes finding my lap. “See, this is why I don’t let people in. You’re right, and I can’t even argue because I never planned to tell you until Saul mentioned the connection and that you wouldn’t want me?—"

He tipped my chin so my eyes were on him. “I love you, Wren. I want you. With this, without it, with another lie, or anything else that comes our way. I want you. But for the record, I am sorry. I want you to know you can trust me and that you’re safe with me.”

“I know I’m safe.” That was true. I had never felt safer with anyone than I did with Archer.

“You keep expecting people to give up on you, that if you push them hard enough, they’ll stay away for good, and you can just rebuild something new out of all that rubble. I’m notleaving, Wren. You can’t push me away. You can’t scare me or do anything that would make this too much.”

As he talked, I was crying and swiping at my face with the bottom of my shirt. Because it was all I’d ever wanted. Someone to just accept me, defective, mean, bitchy, all of it. Just me. Juan never had. My parents had given up on me until I finally tracked them down and showed them I had changed.

But no one had ever just wanted me exactly how I was.

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