Page 21 of My Darling Mayhem

I continued down the street like I didn’t notice what he was doing. Seconds later, he was walking next to me, swinging something around on his key ring within seconds. He wore a regular black hoodie, but it had the name of a bar or something on the front. It matched the large sewn letters on the back of his leather vest that he usually wore.

Mayhem Riot.

Our stride was comical at best. He was walking slower just to keep pace with me while not talking to me, and I couldn’t quite wrap my head around why he was even bothering with me. The sun was shining, and the air was too hot for the cardigan I had pulled on.

Irritation burned under my skin, forcing me to stop.

“Why are you walking with me?”

Archer lifted his head, gesturing toward the bus stop. “Kane?—”

“Doesn’t live with you,” I snapped, harsher than intended.

His shrewd eyes narrowed, and then his jaw started to work back and forth. I had hit a sore spot; I knew I had based on the conversation I had overheard in class that day. Not one I had been invited to hear but had been exposed to just the same. I had information on him that I had now used to wound him.

Red stained my cheeks the longer we stood there. I was ashamed of myself, but I had no idea how to even begin with an apology. Then there was a part of me that wanted a divide, to sever the bridge of neighborly kindness to protect myself and Cruz. I didn’t need to know a motorcycle club president. I didn’t need to be his buddy or friend and have him assume I was okay with his lifestyle.

The bus pulled up; we were just a few yards away now, and before we started toward it, I cleared my throat.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that about Kane, it wasn’t?—”

“You know…” Archer cut me off, forcing my gaze up to his shrewd one. “All my life, I’ve believed the best about people. Even if their first impression of me was always to assume the worst. I have been called worthless and told my life had no meaning, that I’d be better off dead. That I should just do people the kindness of leaving… And yet, I still smile. I still try. I still hold my hand out for a greeting. Time and time again, people just spit in my face, telling me to shove all my good intentions up my ass. I have no idea what I did to deserve your rudeness, and I know I’m not as clean-cut as that guy, Brian, but honestly, Wren, you can fuck all the way off with your judgment.” His glare cut me to my bones, robbing me of breath.

I watched him turn away from me and continue walking toward the bus where Kane had stepped off. He ran to his brother and hugged him around the waist.

Tears burned at the edges of my eyes. I had no reason to be rude to him, but my guard with guys like him was rusted in placeand wouldn’t come down. While Brian was an asshole, I still ventured toward men like him because of how they looked on the outside. The safety they made me feel because they seemed far from dangerous, and yet under Brian’s prestigious ensemble was a shitty human who treated people like they were disposable and expendable.

“Mom!” Cruz was in front of me, and the tears gathering in my eyes would give away that Archer had any impact on me at all, so I quickly swiped at them, with one hand hating that Archer was once again glaring at me while he walked Kane back toward his truck.

Kane waved at Cruz, and my son waved back. I was so mad at myself that I wanted to scream.

All I seemed to do was burrow in my little hole and kick people out. I’d removed anyone and everyone who felt dangerous or like they’d somehow disrupt what I had with my son. But what other options did I have?

I didn’t have the luxury of allowing men into my life who might not stay—or really anyone who could ever hurt us.

Slowly, brick by brick, I closed my heart back up, hating that Archer had found a weakness inside it, and I swung my crutches so that I was moving back toward my house.

“Can I go play with Kane?” Cruz tilted his little face back, squinting at me.

My heart throbbed as I tried to verbally say the rejection sitting on my tongue.

Right as I was about to open my mouth, Archer looked over his shoulder and yelled,

“If Cruz wants to join us, we’re just going to be riding in front of the house…that way, his mom can keep an eye on him, too.”

So, he’d moved to not even addressing me.

Why did that even bother me? It wasn’t like I knew him.

Cruz looked back up at me and smiled. “Can I go?”

With one last glance at the frustrating man in front of me, I gave a warm smile to my kid.

“Yeah, of course.”

He ran ahead of me and joined his friend. Archer gave one last look over his shoulder as the three of them headed to his garage, and I veered toward my driveway, completely alone and aching in more places than just my sprained ankle.

SIX

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