Page 115 of Bet On Me, Daddy

She’d thought nothing else he said could shock her more than the revelation that he’d once been married and apparently nobody knew about it. “Well of course it wasn’t your fault. How could you even think that?”

“Because I should have protected her. Kept her from working so hard she couldn’t even keep her eyes open to drive home. It was my job to keep her safe, and I failed.”

So much about him, about their relationship, clicked into place with that single confession. “That’s not how the world works, Beckett.”

“Yeah, Ice said pretty much the same thing. That I couldn’t shield myself from feeling that kind of pain again by trying to control everything and everyone around me.”

“You can’t, and even if you could, Beckett, I couldn’t let you. Maybe there’s someone else out there who could give you that kind of control over her life, but it’s not me.”

“I know. And it’s not fair of me to ask that of you. I see that now.” He stopped pacing again. “I went to see Grace’s parents today. Mama Julie told me to let you know that if I don’t get my head out of my ass, I’ll have her to answer to.”

“Is that so?” Despite the heaviness of everything he’d shared hanging between them, a smile tugged at her lips. “I’d pay good money to see someone put Beckett Stone in his place.”

He laughed, and to her surprise it didn’t sound forced or strained. “I told her you’d enjoy that. They want to meet you, when things settle a bit.”

How the hell did this conversation keep gettingmoreshocking? “Your late wife’s parents want to meet me?”

“Yeah. Apparently they’ve been waiting for me to find someone new. They seemed pretty annoyed, actually, that I’ve been avoiding falling in love again. Said a lot of the same things Ice did, about how I have to accept that some things are just out of my control. And to stop blaming myself for Grace.”

“Good. Because they’re right.” And her heart broke again, imagining the weight of the guilt he’d been carrying all these years.

“I know. And I’m so fucking sorry, Ruby. You were right, about me taking your choices away, and I don’t have anything else to say but I’m so fucking sorry.”

“Apology accepted.” She wanted that to be the end of it. To just jump into his arms and pretend everything was healed with that simple apology. But it wasn’t fair to her, or to him, to feign ignorance. “But that was a huge breach of trust, Beckett. And I don’t know if I can just let that go. I did that once for a man, turned a blind eye to all those little red flags scattered along the way. Because I loved him, and I thought he loved me. But control isn’t love, and I won’t make the mistake of confusing the two ever again.”

Silence fell, and once again it felt like a barrier between them. Insurmountable.

Until he spoke again.

“Will you tell me about him?”

Wrapping the blanket more tightly around her shoulders, Ruby shrugged. “If you want me to.”

“I do.” Taking a hesitant step forward, he paused, looking so unlike himself her heart broke for him all over again. “I know I need to work on my shit, and I’ve got an appointment with a therapist next week to start doing exactly that. But if we’re going to make this work, I need to know where your hurts are, too. You matter to me, Ruby. I don’t know when it happened, exactly, but this thing between us stopped being casual for me a long time ago.”

“Me too.”

“Okay.” Relief flashed across his face as he settled on the couch beside her. “Then let me in, baby. Please?”

Unease rolled in her stomach at the thought of laying it all out again. At the thought of telling him not just how badly she’d been hurt, but how fucking weak she’d once been. “It’s not, like, losing the love of your life traumatic or anything. He was just an asshole.”

“I didn’t tell you about Grace so you could hide behind my pain, Ruby.” A hint of steel infused his tone, reminding her more of the man she’d fallen for. “This isn’t a contest. Tell me about it.”

“Sorry. I wasn’t trying…” She blew out a breath. “Never mind. That’s a load of shit. I was absolutely trying to hide. Because in a lot of ways I’m still really fucking embarrassed by what happened.”

“Why?”

“Because I should have known better. I shouldn’t have been so damn naïve. Soweak.I gave him all of me, Beckett, and he crushed me.”

“Then tell me. And we’ll carry it together.”

How the hell could she refuse a request like that?

She couldn’t. So she told him. All of it. And she watched as his expression changed from shock to horror to a fury so deep and hot she wondered how it didn’t simply explode out of him.

But it didn’t. Somehow, he kept it all contained and he just… listened.

It wasn’t until the entire story had been told, and she finally felt a weight lifting from her shoulders, that she realized how badly she’d needed him to justlisten.

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