Page 84 of His Secret Obsession

“You’re…here.”

Despite the shock still running rampant through my system, I drink him in. I want to rejoice at seeing him again. I want to run into his arms, and never let him go. Questions swirl through my mind, but they all get stuck on my tongue as I give him a dumbfounded stare.

“The captain told me…” He’s silent as he studies me, his gaze sliding down my body and back up again. He takes a hesitant step forward, his hands balling into fists at his sides. “He told me you wanted a copy of the report from your accident, and henoticed my name was on it. And I thought maybe…” His eyes snag on the papers still clutched in my hands, and a pained expression crosses his face.

“I’m sorry,” he says softly. I’m not a hundred percent sure why he’s apologizing. I stand up, slowly facing him as I step forward. A cold breeze whips around me, sending a shiver through my body. I cross my arms for warmth, and Jax frowns. I open my mouth to speak, but he beats me to it. “Can we get out of here?”

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

Another breeze blows through, stealing the breath from my lungs. I grimace, hugging myself tighter as my body continues to shiver. My cheeks feel chapped now, and my fingers are numb. His eyes darken, a displeased sort of rumble building from deep within his chest. He immediately shrugs out of his jacket before draping it over my shoulders. I whoosh out a breath as the lingering warmth from his body heat envelopes me.

“I’ll answer any questions you have as soon as I get you someplace warm and private.”

I huff as he turns on his heels, striding towards his truck without so much as one backward glance. Quickening my steps, I hurry after him. He holds the passenger door open for me, waiting patiently as I catch up to him. I can’t help but glare at him as my body brushes against his and mumble a dark “arrogant asshole” under my breath.

He chuckles, a cloud of breath puffing out into the winter air. His eyes meet mine, a hint of mirth dancing in his pupils. “Glad to see you haven’t lost the attitude,” he murmurs, his eyes lingering on my lips. He leans into the truck, his wintergreen body wash crowding me as his thumb glides along my bottom lip. “I bet my brother never had the first clue how to handle you, did he?”

I suck in a breath, heat warming my blood as I nip at his thumb. He groans.

Bad idea, Maddie.

“Behave,” he murmurs with an admonishing look, but I don’t miss the desire lighting up his eyes. Or the exhaustion lining his face. It cools some of my lust, making my heart feel heavy. It reminds me that this separation hasn’t been any easier on him than it’s been on me. Grabbing my seatbelt, he leans across my body and buckles me in. His shoulders graze along the front of my chest, and this time, I shiver for a different reason.

After making sure my door is firmly shut, he walks around to the driver’s side and climbs in. The truck turns on, heat immediately blasting from the vents. I glance over at Jax, feeling a little nervous to be in an enclosed space with him. We don’t have a great track record of keeping our hands to ourselves. But if he’s worried about it, he doesn’t give it away. Instead, he studies me with a frown.

“Jesus, Maddie, how long were you outside? Your nose is red.” Leaning forward, he turns the full blast of heat directly on me. It feels like heaven, the warmth making me want to moan. But I won’t admit to that.

I shrug instead. “I’m fine.”

He grunts, clearly not believing me. His forearms flex as he turns the wheel, the truck pulling out of the parking lot and onto the highway. It occurs to me then that he’s always taken care of me. Silently, without question, and without expectations. I’m filled with an unexpected rush of gratitude and affection…and love. A slight pressure settles behind my eyes, but I blink it away.

We drive in silence for nearly twenty minutes. Although we occasionally give one another sneaky side-eye glances, the silence is comfortable. My body relaxes in the seat as the cold gradually seeps out of me, replaced with a cozy warmth. Oddly enough, I don’t feel the need to ask him where we’re going. I trust him without question. The highway turns into a curvy, back road and I realize we are climbing up.

Just as we near the road that will take us into Cedarwood Mountains, he pulls over into an overlook. The truck pulls into a parking spot, but he doesn’t turn off the engine. I peer at the magnificent view in front of me, the mountaintops looming overhead, the trees bare of leaves this time of year but no less beautiful. Sitting here, having to crane my neck to peer up at the peaks, it makes my problems feel insignificant.

Next to me, I hear Jax’s weary sigh. When I peer over at him, he’s leaning back in his seat with his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose. I wait as he gathers his thoughts, marveling at this rare show of vulnerability. When he opens his eyes, it looks like he’s lost in his head—perhaps lost in long-buried memories. A bit of sadness dances across his face, reminding me of everything that’s happened between us. Placing my hand over his, I give it a gentle squeeze. His eyes flit back up to mine with a rueful smile, and he clears his throat.

“I didn’t even know you, but my heart nearly stopped when I saw your broken body trapped in the backseat.” The sentence comes out in a strangled, hoarse whisper and he makes a pained noise. For a moment, his eyes look wild and it makes my pulse pound. The fingers of his free hand are white-knuckled over the steering wheel. “If I loved you then the way I do now? It would have fucking destroyed me.”

All the noise, all the questions in my brain screech to a standstill. A quiet, hushed gasp slips from my throat. I blink, my mind latching on to one very important word:love.

“I had picked up an extra shift because the snowstorm was coming in earlier than expected, and the captain wanted all hands on deck.” He shakes his head. “I wasn’t even supposed to be there that day, and I almost turned down the request. Luke was in his senior year of high school, and I wanted to spend as much time as possible with him before he went off to college. But I didn’t want to leave them hanging if things got busy.”

His eyes slide over to me, and I can’t make heads or tails of his expression. “Isn’t that ironic? Sometimes I wonder if there really is a greater being out there, nudging us in the right direction. Making sure that people cross paths at just the right time. Maybe it’s stupid, but some part of me likes to think you needed me that day. That any of the men in my department could have pulled you out of that car, but you needed it to beme.”

His words make my head spin and my heart race in a way that is both exhilarating and terrifying. I wish I could climb onto his lap and bury my face in his neck. He continues speaking, and I find myself desperate to catch every single word.

“As awful as it sounds, when you’ve been a first responder for a while, a lot of calls begin to blend together. But there are always the few that stick out to you, maybe even change the way you think.” His smile looks forced. “You were that for me, Maddie. The things I saw that day, I haven’t forgotten a single second of it.” His hand rests on my knee, his thumb rubbing circles over my pants.

“I wish I could say it was love at first sight, but honestly, you were just this young woman I thought about from time to time. I would often stop in the middle of my day and wonder how you were doing, if you were recovering. A few times I thought about tracking you down, just to check in on you.”

I swallow the lump in my throat, wanting to speak. To say something. But I can’t. He gives me an understanding smile, his hand squeezing my knee.

“A year passed, and over time, I thought less and less of that day. But that night in the bar—for some reason you had been on my mind that morning.” The hand on my knee moves to my neck, his rough palm resting on the back of it while his thumb brushes over my pulse point. It makes my heart stutter and my breathing come a little faster.

“Some drunk woman was hanging all over me, trying to get my interest. I wanted nothing to do with her, but I didn’t want to be rude. I was trying to think of a way to get her to leave. All of a sudden, there you were, looking like an avenging goddess.” His quiet laughter makes me smile. “You should have seen the look in your eye when you walked up to us. Baby, you were spitting fire on my behalf.” His face splits into a grin while a flush steals over mine.

“I was ready to hand my heart to you on a silver platter, no questions asked. You almost brought me to my fucking knees right then and there.”

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