Page 14 of Unlearning

I saw him watching me, waiting for me to look at the bird, to acknowledge his offering to me. And I did, I looked at the bird, and then at him, and just like that, my stomach knew if I didn’t start running right now, my heart might come to the conclusion that this huge male who was capable of noticing and appreciating the tiny yellow bird might also take said heart in hisbig warm hand and maybe even build a nest for it. So I yelled, “race you to the Canyon!” and I ran until all I felt was burning in my calves.

???

“How can you be so good at this?” James grumbled for the hundredth time since we'd started working together.

“My mom is a clerk at my old Alpha's office,” I tried to seriously answer his question. “And in school I've always been good at tasks that had been clearly outlined for me. That's never changed. I like knowing what is expected of me, and I like instant gratification for my work, like a grade or a reward, so paperwork is something I not only don't mind, but also kind of enjoy,” I admitted, sipping my Coke. He seemed to be mulling it over for some time.

We were sitting at a sports bar in Crescent City on a Friday night, our week of office work behind us, so we’d decided to get some dinner, relax a bit, and drive back to Redwood the next day.

“Did you buy all the stuff you needed? Samantha?” he tried again.

“Sorry!”

“Are you actually watching TV right now?” he laughed in disbelief.

“It's not what you think! Well, in a way. I think that's my ex boyfriend, number 27,” I pointed at the game playing on the TV. I hadn’t even heard that he got traded to the Minnesota Timberwolves.

“You used to date Andrew Olson?”

“Yeah, in college. He is originally from Minnesota so I bet he's over the moon right now playing for them. That was probably his dream scenario. And his wife is Minnesotan as well, so win-win.”

“How long were you guys together?”

“Almost a year. He was my first boyfriend ever, actually, after everything happened with, you know,” I grimaced slightly.

“Wow, first boyfriend ever and you immediately get yourself a professional basketball player,” he teased, obviously trying to lighten the mood, which I was grateful for.

“Well yeah, he was the only human who didn't look like prey,” I laughed.

He laughed too, then turned his entire body to me and leaned forward conspiratorially, “I bet you were the one who broke it off.”

We were sitting next to each other at the bar, so once I turned to face him my legs were between his, a mischievous grin on his face.

“And why would you say that?” I felt my face heat, it was like there was no ventilation in this bar all of a sudden.

“Oh, come on Samantha, it's not like human men can outdo a shifter inthatdepartment,” he winked.

It was a weird conversation to be having with professional, serious James. If I hadn't heard him order lemonade I'd think it was the drink getting to him.

“I wouldn't know,” I looked away.

He frowned, puzzled.

“I've onlybeenwith Andrew.”

His head jerked back. I looked away.

“My mate didn't,” I had to force myself to say this out loud, but I felt it needed to be said, because it was true, “he didn't want to sleep with me. I guess he saw being with his true mate as cheating on his pregnant fiancée. And afterwards, I never tried dating wolves. I am not interested in sex without a relationship, and since I don't want to be a placeholder until someone meetstheir mate, and I'm no mate stealer, it's humans or nothing,” I elaborated.

“What about wolves who've lost their mate?” he asked, pensive.

I put my head in my hands. “I don't want to be someone's second choice. A male who marked and mated the person who isperfectfor them will always have that ideal in his heart. I am notthatdesperate yet.”

He nodded, deep in thought. Just then our wings arrived, and we started eating.

“What about you?” I inquired between bites. I actually knew very little about James’ private life. I knew some of his professional quirks and a lot about his daily life, but almost nothing about his past and circumstances. I’d seen many pack females shooting him looks, sitting too close to him during meals, or casually brushing against him in the halls, but I'd never smelled a female on him, and we worked together almost daily. Maybe he simply went outside of the pack for his needs during his days off.

“Well,” he finished chewing, swallowed, and wiped his mouth. “Part of it I'll tell you some other time when the setting is more appropriate. Short story is, I've tried going out with a few humans, and with some females – neither has really worked out for me. I've been alone for a while now and I'm used to it. I don't love it, but it is what it is.”

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