Page 59 of Hush 3: Hidden Family

“She is a friend of a friend,” I say and shrug, not knowing how else to explain.

CHAPTER 30

Following Advice

Symphony

Three months later …

“Are you sure this is what you want to do?” Adriano asks as we climb into the car after arriving in Italy on a private jet.

I’ve come to see my husband. After four months of thinking about it, I decided to follow Maribel’s advice. I still don’t know if I will ask for a divorce, but I’ve considered it.

“This is where he is. It is where I need to be,” I reply.

Adriano sighs and shakes his head. “She is sure to get me killed,” he grumbles under his breath.

“I have not seen a single member of my family this year. If they are too busy to come to America, I have come to them.”

“Fanculo, have you thought that maybe things here are keeping them from coming to you?”

“That is likely, but I can only be sure if I’m here to find out.”

“You are here for him. You have stepped into danger because he is a coward and ignores you exist.”

“Enough. You will not speak of my husband like this. Michael and I have our issues, but that is our business,” I growl.

The car falls silent. I have started to pop the band on my wrist. Adriano’s displeasure with Michael is something I am very aware of.

I don’t need a reminder. Not now. I’m nervous enough.

I lied to Maribel. I told her I hadn’t seen my husband since I was sixteen because I was too embarrassed to tell her what happened the last time I saw him. I was twenty-one and freaked out because my husband gave me cunnilingus.

Things have been so strained between Michael and I since that night. I want to fix things. I want to be with him.

I believe Maribel was right. I need to go to Michael and let him know how I feel. I have chosen to ignore Ellen Mairettie’s warning. I have nothing to prove her words mean anything.

I need to see Michael. I don’t believe I should just call. Calling leaves room for complications and misunderstandings.

This is hard enough for me. I can learn to become a black belt fighter by watching videos. I’ve become a weapons specialist in the same manner. My tablet has always been my friend.

It has brought the world to me. If I want to know something I spend hours diving into knowledge, separating myths from facts. Once the information begins to play in my mind like a symphony, I find that I’m satisfied and have the knowledge I desire for that subject.

It is how I learn. However, emotions and relationships can’t be taught through my tablet. Trust me, I’ve tried. I haven’t found an answer to what I’m doing wrong with Michael.

“I’m sorry,” Adriano says as he reaches to cover my hand to keep me from popping the band.

“It’s okay. I am under a lot of stress. I might be overreacting.”

“You are not. I have overstepped.”

“I don’t speak of Michael to anyone. It is hard to explain how I feel about him, about what I know he has sacrificed for me.

“He doesn’t neglect me out of cruelty. Other things keep us apart. I want … I …” I shake my head as I have trouble finding the right words.

I’m so frustrated. I hate it when I can’t draw my words together. It’s like the words are right there, but I can’t express them the way I want.

“You don’t have to explain it to me.”

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