Page 49 of Faking Ever After

“Benny,” Emily said. “He tasted too many spirits on an empty stomach, got drunk, and thought it would be a brilliant idea to diversify his investment portfolio.” A small smile touched her face, but she ironed it out quickly.

“And how did he do that?” Percy asked.

Emily paused for dramatic effect, suppressing a bubble of laughter visibly. “He sauntered over to Harry Peterson’s widow and tried to serenade her, thinking Aunt Judith couldn’t see him.”

My mouth dropped open, but the demon siblings snapped their mouths like they were trying to bite down their laughter. “Dear me,” Percy said. “Is Aunt Judith very upset?”

Emily shot him a deviously mischievous look. “What do you think?”

I imagined that she very much would be, but Percy and Emily seemed pretty chill about the whole thing.

It didn’t seem to interest Percy much beyond saying, “Problems tend to resolve themselves if you’re patient enough.” He kicked his sandals off and sat on a lounger chair facing the pool. “Got any more of that Citron, sis?”

“Would I go all the way up there without bringing any for my brother?” Emily asked sarcastically. “It’s chilling in the fridge.”

Percy tucked his hands under his head and sighed contentedly. “Are you joining us, babe?” he asked.

I shook my head. “I gotta…”

“She’s fine, Finn,” Percy said. “Trust me.”

I decided I would trust him with my secrets, but I wasn’t so sure he understood the concept ofbeing finein this case. “I’ll just go and make sure that’s the case.”

“Sweet as a muffin, our Finn,” Emily said.

I didn’t understand them one bit, so I went inside and heard the shouting for myself. “…want to see you near my boy again. Go to that woman. See if she’ll have you. See if she swoons so easily.”

Benny stumbled into the hallway with an old, worn suitcase and a hat on his head, sweat pouring down his red face. “It was an honest mistake, Judy. I didn’t realize it was her house.”

“Out!” Aunt Judith bellowed, and Benny tripped as he moved backward. He saw me and pressed his handkerchief against his forehead.

“Finney,” he blurted. “Is Percy around, perchance? I was wondering if he gave that submarine idea some thought. Good business, that is.”

“I’m afraid he hasn’t, Benny,” I said. “Sinking things aren’t the soundest investment.”

“Well, we’ll be in touch,” Benny said, trying for some surety in his cracking tone. “My people will reach out to his people. We’ll have it all sorted out. Plenty of opportunities. Plenty. Anyway…” He stumbled backward toward the door and bowed out.

Aunt Judith stood straight in the bedroom when I appeared in the open doorway. “Um, Judith, are you…okay?”

“Oh, Finn,” Aunt Judith said, her face stern and hard. “Did you hear all of that?”

“Just the last bit,” I admitted. “I’m so sorry about the way it turned out.”

Aunt Judith smoothed her blouse a little and looked at me in wonder. “Sorry? What on Earth for?”

“Um…Benny being a, well, a scammer.” My words only seemed to confuse her. “That’s why he was here, right?”

Aunt Judith threw her head back and laughed until she jiggled all over. “Oh, darling Finn, don’t be sorry. Benny’s biggest sin was that he was nowhere near as fun as I’d imagined. But that’s my mistake.”

“You knew?” I asked.

Judith looked at me levelly. “Of course I knew, Finn. Who do you take me for?” It seemed to amuse her endlessly to watch confusion ripple across my face. “I’m sixty-two, dear, and I am perfectly happy to remain single. My priorities aren’t the same as yours because you’re still so young.” She smiled softly.“I don’t want a husband, Finn. I don’t want someone in my house where all my things are.” She practically shuddered before relaxing a little. “Ah, but we all like to have a bit of fun and a bit of attention, and who is better at flattery than the snake oil salesman?”

My brain blocked the images ofa bit of fun,like an explicit Google Image search, blurring the reality so I wouldn’t have to live with the memory of it. Still, the surprise made my body vibrate. “But…” I stammered and fell silent.

Aunt Judith shrugged a little and moved toward me. “But why did I let a faithless stranger into Alicia and Lawrence’s home? He couldn’t do any harm, Finn. Do you think this was the first Benny Tupper that came after Percy’s wealth? Since he sold that strange encryption code, he’s been attracting them like honey attracts flies. Sometimes, they’re fun, dear.”

I wasn’t sure if I was horrified that Aunt Judith reeled in scammers for some summer fun or impressed by her vitality.