Page 31 of The Embrace of Evergreen

“The Star is an omen of faith and hope. Your path has been a difficult one, and The Star marks the end of a period of hurt and confusion. Your past challenges have caused you to question yourself, but The Star asks you to believe in yourself and your gifts and in the future fate has laid out for you. It is the beginning of a peaceful, loving phase of life in which you’ll find stability, understanding, and deep personal connections with those you love. Though you struggle to accept it, your heart is filled with hope. It’s a small tentative thing right now, but if you nurture it, you’ll find that what you secretly dream of is actually right in front of you.”

Blue is silent for a long, weighted moment. We all are. I’m waiting for Gabriel to make a joke since he apparently has some weird issue with tarot reading, but he’s as quiet as the rest of us. When Blue finally speaks, his voice trembles, and his words are so quiet I can barely make them out.

“Hope is dangerous.”

My heart nearly cracks in half. I don’t know what lurks in Blue’s past, but I know it’s nothing good. In thismoment, it’s clear just how strongly whatever happened to him has shaped the man I know. Despite all of my losses, all of my pain and grief and longing, I’ve never given up hope. For me, to lose hope would be to lose everything.

She nods softly, her expression tender and serious. “It can be, and it can be hard to open yourself back up to hope after you’ve been deeply hurt. But,” her gaze flicks away from Blue, and her bright, almost golden eyes find mine, “it can also be the single point of light in the dark. The one thing a person clings to when they have nothing else. It can be the most important thing in the world.”

Time seems to freeze for a few moments before she breaks into a smile and turns her gaze to Blue once more. “This is a good card, and I have faith that even though there will always be challenges in your life, you’ll find love and joy as well.”

Blue’s brilliant hair falls forward to cover the side of his face as he shakes his head, seeming to break out of the trance he’d momentarily fallen into. “Well,” he laughs awkwardly, “that’s good. At least I didn’t pull a card that says I’m destined to get trampled by a moose on the walk to the car.”

He rises quickly from the seat and gestures in my direction with a tilt of his head. “Come on, let’s check your cards for moose too.”

I appreciate the way he always tries to lighten the mood with jokes, but as she moves the deck she used for Blue to the side and fans out a new one, anxiety bubbles in the pit of my stomach. Even though I don’t believe in the existence of magic or the ability of a card to tell me about my future, I have to admit that something about this woman makes me curious. She’s obviously out here making things up to make people happy. She’s giving them what she thinks they want to hear in order to make a living, so it’s not like she’d do much business if she went around predicting train wrecks and moose tramplings. I know this is just a skill she’s perfected over the years, but she doesn’t seem disingenuous. Something about her words to Blue felt so deep and heartfelt that I desperately want to believe she’ll see happiness for me as well.

I point to a card in the very center of the deck, and she flips it the way she did for Blue.

“The Ten of Cups. You’re a lucky man, I think. This is arguably the best card in the deck.”

“What does it mean?”

Her elegant fingers deftly shift the rest of the deck back into a pile, leaving only the single card sitting in the center of the table.

“The Ten of Cups is a card of joy and fulfillment. It shows me that the path you’re on is the one path in this life that will make you the happiest.”

Gabriel snorts behind me. “It’s not like he can look at all of his potential life paths on a chart and see that this one is the best. Of course you’re going to say that the path he’s on is going to make him happy.”

She smiles at Gabriel kindly. Despite his rude interruption, there’s no trace of irritation or frustration in her expression. If anything, she seems even more compassionate.

“That’s true, of course, and there’s no reason for you to believe me. There’s no logical reason you should, nor are there any consequences for disbelief. The universe is a big place, full of wonders that we can’t even imagine, and maybe not everything needs a concrete explanation. All I offer is what I see.”

Gabriel snorts again, but he doesn’t say anything in response, which in and of itself is strange; he has something to say about everything.

She taps the card lightly with one bright-purple nail. “This card also signifies the presence of true love. Maybe it’s a romantic love, maybe it’s another kind, but it’s there, and it’s so vast and inclusive and brilliant that it will change your life forever. It will bring you contentment and a sense of belonging unlike any you’ve ever known. You may not quickly recognize it when it steps into your path, and it may be hard to remember how important love is at times, but hold onto it no matter how intensely the storm of life swirls around you, and it will never let you down. Love will be there to bring lightin the dark, to catch you when you stumble, and to dance joyously at your side.”

Dance joyously at my side? I don’t think she was standing near us during Gabriel’s performance this evening. If she was, I didn’t see her, and surely she’s spent her whole day working during such a busy festival instead of watching the crowds in order to offer free tarot readings that make people feel like she’s a mind reader. There is absolutely no way she knows what I was thinking earlier when I was watching Blue dance. Nope, no way at all. I’m just reading into her phrasing because I’m still so surprised at the way I found myself watching him.

“Umm…ya…that’s…that’s a pretty good reading, I guess.” I laugh awkwardly. “Thank you so much.”

“It’s my pleasure, sweetheart. Something about you just feels like you needed something good and light in your life today. I’m glad the cards seem to think so too.”

“You know,” I reply, thinking about Blue dancing in the sun and sitting next to me on an old moss-covered bench and telling me about his blue foods while we shared a bed last night. “I think I got exactly what I needed today, thank you…umm…”

She offers me a wink. “Marigold.”

“Marigold,” I repeat as I stand. “Thank you again.”

“My pleasure, deary,” she says as she turns her attention to Gabriel.

“You’re up.”

“Ummm, no thanks. I pass,” he mumbles as he starts to back away from the booth, but there’s no way I’m letting that happen. At this point, I’m fully invested, and I want to know what she has to say to him. Apparently, Blue feels the same because before I can take matters into my own hands, he’s grabbed Gabriel by the shoulders and all but shoved him down into the chair, ignoring his protests the entire time.

“Oh, come on, Gabriel.” I rest my hand lightly on his shoulder. “I can’t believe you’re not all over this. You’re the most adventurous of us by leaps and bounds. Who knows, maybe she’ll tell you the name of your true love.”

He snorts in response and aggressively pokes at a card in the deck she fanned out while we wrestled him into the chair. When she flips it over, I’m stunned to see a card that features two muscular mermen with their tails intertwined. Both of the decks Blue and I pulled cards from were a bit old-fashioned, with gilded images of items, not people. Gabriel’s card is brightly colored, with swirling purples and aquas and sleek modern lines. The fact that it’s two men instead of a man and a woman is also a surprise.

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