Page 66 of Winter's End

Each place was more stunning than the next. High ceilings, marble tile, bathrooms fit for kings … The houses were the kind of opulence I could only dream of. My heart twinged at the very thought. I wasn’t an elegant man, not by any means. But I couldn’t deny the pull toward this possibility of a future.

We both agreed on one in particular. It had a closed in backyard with a huge pool and hot-tub, and a kitchen made for a true cook.

Shane and Winter were useless at cooking. I had no idea if Logan could cook, but all I had ever seen him eat were salads and high-protein healthy meals—the man had once inhaled cocaine like it was oxygen, but he didn’t eat bacon.

Where one was willing to draw the line was a psychotherapist’s wet dream.

Cam knew his way around a grill—his Southern cooking was to die for, and Drew and I had been living the independent bachelor life for years. A real kitchen to cook in with the time to do it was an appealing feature.

Butterflies flapped their wings in my stomach. I wanted this life so badly; but could I leave Mom and Devon to do it?

Once the houses were thoroughly vetted, I filled Drew in on my morning. He scrubbed his palms down his bearded jaw and grimaced.

“Fuck, man, that’s shitty. How are you holding up?”

“Surviving.” I released a long breath and allowed every ounce of exhaustion to show on my face. “I’m drained to hell, but I’ll make it through. We’re all in the same boat here.”

A long silence sat between us before Drew straightened and clapped me on the shoulder, changing the depressing topic before I melted into the floor with the weight of it all.

“I’ve got another question for you.” He flipped the pages of his notebook to an earlier page.

“Think you could find out what Kellan’s initiation into the Carlos Cartel was? I have a theory that Georgio’s initiation led to all our parents making bad decisions. But I couldn’t even guess what it was.”

Kellan sent me messages semi-regularly; at least every few days. I had to bring him up to speed with Georgio’s power display this morning—I should have let him know right away, but I’d needed the temporary reprieve from all the double-agent subterfuge for a few hours. It was exhausting being everyone’s piece on this chessboard.

I would feel better if I knew which piece I was.

“I’ll ask him tonight.” I stood to leave.

My shift started in two hours and all this talk of our potential futures made me want to check in on Mom, Devon’s presence be damned.

“Sounds good. Thanks for coming over, man.”

Drew’s smile was genuine and full of warmth. The origin of our friendship was definitely unorthodox, but I couldn’t deny the man had grown on me.

I returned his smile. “Keep me posted, okay?”

I made it to my personal hell hole with ten minutes to spare and jumped onto the bar to relieve Colin for the night.

I’d play this game, and put my limited optimism into a future beyond Georgio, Kellan, and the fuckery that was this town and everyone in it.

I’d make a life with my girl and her band of men. My band of men.

And hopefully that dream wouldn’t break my heart.

CHAPTER 18

WINTER

“Do you think Kellan was a child soldier?” Hillary’s voice emerged from her enormous closet. I sat on her ridiculously soft bed, browsing the six takeout menus in front of me.

Her bedroom at the Carlisle condo was a contrast of six different shades of gray and white, but it felt warm and inviting. Large floor to ceiling windows looked out into the bustling town below, its lights twinkling as the dark blue sky transitioned to navy.

My bougie friend had wanted to ‘take me out on the town’ tonight, but I’d begged her to let us stay in, eat enough salt and MSG until we felt extremely bloated, and watch shitty television until we passed out onher couch.

She had looked at me like I had three heads, but relented when I told her she could take me out for breakfast and choose what we watched tonight. I had a feeling I was going to regret that.

“It’s possible,” I murmured thoughtfully as I scanned the paper menu for my favorite dishes. “Travis said he’d joined the FBI when he was 16—something about being in one of Antonio’s training camps.”

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