Page 25 of 10 Ways to Accidentally Fall in Love

Especially when said source has more hands-on experience with dick than me. Jason’s tally might only be two, but that’s still one more than I’ve handled. My one, obviously, being my own.

“You really like him, huh?” Jason asks, pulling me from my phallus-centered thoughts.

“Uh,yeah. I already told you that. He’s my Joey Kangaroo.”

“Mhm,” he hums. “And what does this kangaroo look like?”

I sit back against the hard plastic of my chair as I pull up the mental image of Joey from our gym sesh last night. He was wearing shorts like usual, the blue ones, not the gray. And even though we struck out earlier in the week with Lewis, he seemed in good spirits.

“He’s like… If niceness were a man,” I say. “His eyes are warm like brownies. And he’s all muscly in a kinda soft way? Like a loaf of challah. Add some chocolate sprinkles on top for his hair, and there you have it.”

“Sounds…edible,” Jason mumbles.

“Do you think I should add that to his bio?”

Jason drops his head into his hands with a groan. “Ithinkyoushouldbitehim.”

“What?”

He lets his palms hit the table. “Did you seriously make him a dating profile? Is that what this is?”

“Yes?” I say slowly. “What else am I supposed to do? Walk around with a sign that says ‘Me and dude-friend looking for some guy love’?”

“Don’t do that,” Jason says quickly. “Why not try, I don’t know… A gay bar?”

“Huh,” I say. “I hadn’t thought of that. That’d be fun. Queer dudes know how to dance.”

Jason appears to be biting his tongue.

“You all right?” I ask.

He nods.

“Your face is a little red,” I point out.

“I’m just wondering how honest I should be,” Jason says. “I said I’d stay out of it, but it’shard.”

“Hard,” I say with a chuckle.

“Je-sus,” Jason groans, sliding his lunch tray to the side. He crosses his arms on top of the table, looking serious. That face has me sitting a little taller in my own seat. “Okay, here’s the thing. You’ve always known you like girls, right?”

“Yeah?”

“Right. But have you ever…triedlooking at a guy that way?”

“What way?” I ask. “Like, imagining them with boobs?”

Jason blinks. “No. Like imagining a guy. Withyou.”

“Doing what with me?”

His eyes narrow. “Are you being purposefully obtuse?Withyou, with you, Bee. I dunno. Going down on you, maybe? Or you fucking them?”

I consider that for a moment. Joey is the first guy that pops into my head, but a flash of him down on his knees feels so wrong, it immediately pops back out again. I shouldn’t be thinking of my friend like that. It’s not right.

I try a different guy instead. Some random dude sitting at a table a little ways away. I mentally rearrange him, bending him over the surface. Pushing his scrubs out of the way? Wondering if his thighs are hairy or a little on the smoother side, like Joey’s.

Shit.

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