Page 109 of 10 Ways to Accidentally Fall in Love

Jason is quiet for a minute. “It wasn’t any one thing. It felt…inevitable. From the very beginning. He was…unlike anyone else I’d ever known. All I wanted was to spend time with him. To know him better. He made me feel strong because I never doubted what I meant to him. I fell in love like the changing of the seasons. Slowly and inescapably. And I knew it because…because I didn’t want to look forward into a future that didn’t have him.”

I let out a breath, wiping at my cheek. “I’m really happy for you, you know.”

“Yeah,” he says quietly. “I do know. I’m happy for me, too. Do you…do you think you might be in love with Joey?”

Joey himself finally looks my way, smiling softly as he catches my eye. Even from halfway across the room, I can see the warmth in his gaze. The way those brown eyes are impossibly kind and endlessly patient. Is Jason right? Is that love?

I return Joey’s smile, even as my gut rolls at the thought of hurting this man in any shape or form. I never wanted that. I don’t want to hurt Joey.

“I think…” I say slowly, Joey’s words from the other day coming to mind, along with the same feeling of unfathomablefondness they evoked in me the first time around, the swell of it in my chest almost uncomfortable but…not. “I think every day he’s in it is better simply because he’s there.”

Jason lets out a quiet hum. “You do like him.”

“So much,” I admit, knowing the words aren’t nearly enough. “I don’t want to break things off. I want…”

Boyfriendseems like such a trite word. I’ve been a boyfriend before. But none of my past relationships felt anything like what I have with Joey.

Have I been fooling myself? Going along with this whole bennies package out of fear that he might not feel the same way I do? But if he does… If Jason is right…

“I have some thinking to do,” I tell my friend.

“Of course. I didn’t fuck things up, did I?” Jason asks. “I wasn’t trying to be a dick. I just—”

“No,” I assure him. “I think I needed to hear it. Thank you.”

“Yeah,” he says. “I’ll see you Friday?”

“Yep. Love you, Birdie.”

“You, too, Bee.”

I click off the call and slip my phone back in my pocket. Blowing out a breath, I head over to where Joey is waiting.

“Hey,” he says as soon as I’m close. “Everything all right?”

“Yep,” I answer as chipperly as I can. “I think I’m done here, though. Ready to head out?”

“Sure. Your place or mine tonight?”

“It’s a Joey-bode night,” I say as we walk toward the locker room. “I just need to take care of something first, so meet you there?”

Joey gives me a searching look, but then he nods.

We wash up in separate showers, like usual, but we end up in front of our lockers at the same time, pulling on our clothes almost in sync. I don’t stop myself from looking Joey over, knowing no one else is around to care about my ogling. Joeycertainly doesn’t seem to mind. He perks up—in more ways than one—as his gaze rakes over me in return.

I didn’t see Joey walk in today, having arrived after him, so when he finishes getting dressed and pulls the bright pink fanny pack out of his locker, I choke on a laugh.

“Quite handy,” he says, giving me a wink as he clips it on, the jangle of his keys inside evident.

“Fuck,” I mutter, that fondness trying to crack my chest open. “Why are you so great?”

“You sure you’re all right?” he asks, looking at me in an almost worried way. I don’t know why until I register the moisture at the corners of my eyes.

“Fine,” I say quickly, blinking and grabbing my things. “See you in an hour or so?”

“Yeah. C’mere.”

I step forward, and Joey tugs me in the rest of the way. The feel of his lips against mine is just as intoxicatingly perfect as his arms wrapped around me. I can sense the inexplicable prickling of tears again and forcibly quell them, my hold on Joey’s shirt pulling the fabric tight.

---