Page 63 of In Plain Sight

Sinbin: I feel like I fake most things tbh

MrNiceGuy: what do you mean?

Sinbin: do you ever feel like you’re just going through the motions? Like you put on a happy face and tell everyone you’re fine because that’s what they want to hear and not because you’re actually fine?

MrNiceGuy: constantly. I’ve noticed that most people don’t want a real answer when they ask how you are. They’re just being polite

Sinbin: I hate that. And I don’t get it. If I ask someone how they’re doing, I want to know the answer. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t ask. And how is it more polite to ask someone how they are and not care than it is to just not ask?

MrNiceGuy: I’ve never understood it either. etiquette is weird

Sinbin: so weird

Sinbin: and pointless

MrNiceGuy: very pointless, especially in today’s world

Sinbin: yeah

Sinbin: so, how are you doing?

MrNiceGuy: lmao I’m surviving

Sinbin: surviving? That doesn’t sound good

MrNiceGuy: it’s not great, but it tends to be my baseline so it’s not bad

Sinbin: surviving is your baseline? And here I thought I was the only one living like that

MrNiceGuy: how are you doing?

I bit my lip, my thumbs hovering over my keypad. I really didn’t want to dump my personal crap on him, but I’d just gone on a rant about people not caring about my answers when they ask how I am. It would be hypocritical of me to brush off his concern.

Sinbin: not great tbh

MrNiceGuy: no? are you okay?

Sinbin: yeah, mostly

Sinbin: Like *I’m* okay, but I just had something huge dumped on me and I’m having trouble processing it

MrNiceGuy: what happened?

MrNiceGuy: you don’t have to tell me but it might help to talk it out with someone who has no irl connections to you

Sinbin: I swear I didn’t message you because I wanted you to play therapist

MrNiceGuy: I know. I asked, remember?

Sinbin: yeah, it’s just hard for me to talk to people about personal stuff. I always feel like I’m a burden when I do. Like it’s not okay for me to need help and relying on people or leaning on them will only push them away

MrNiceGuy: I know the feeling

Sinbin: you have that problem too?

MrNiceGuy: yeah. I’m so used to people not caring and not wanting to listen when I talk that it’s hard for me to open up to people, especially face to face

Sinbin: are you close with your parents?

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