Page 56 of In Plain Sight

“Four months.”

“Four months?” His face hardened. “That’s bullshit. It’s not your fault. You know that, right?”

I smiled at how outraged he was, and the last of my trepidation melted away. Luka wasn’t going to judge me or get annoyed at me for dropping my problems on him. He wanted to help, the same as I wanted to help him.

“I know,” I said. “I believed it for years, but now I know she’s just lashing out because she’s angry when she says stuff like that.”

“What did she want? When she called?”

“She wanted me to help with something at her church. I couldn’t because I had to work, and she got mad that I wouldn’t take the day off. I haven’t had anything to do with the church for years, but she won’t accept that, and she tries to guilt me into volunteering because it would make her look better to her friends.”

“Are you religious?” he asked.

“Not anymore.” I snuck a glance at him. “Are you?”

He shook his head. “Why did you leave the church, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“It’s a long and complicated story.”

“I’m all ears if you think telling it might help.”

I paused. I’d talked Ivy, Dev, and Nate’s ears off about my mom and everything that led to me leaving the church, but maybe talking to someone who didn’t know my history and hadn’t lived through it with me would help. It couldn’t hurt. Unless he realized just how messed up I was and decided that being my friend was too much work.

“You don’t have to,” he said when I didn’t answer. “But I’m a good listener.”

I resisted the urge to turn away from him. Talking to the wall was easier, but if Luka was going to put in the effort to listen, then I could at least talktohim and not at him. “My mom joined her church when I was nine. Before that, she was…a different person.”

“I feel like you’re choosing your words very carefully. You don’t have to,” he said softly. “You can if it’s easier. But you don’t have to worry about what you say to me or how you say it.”

I blew out a breath. He was right. Censoring myself wasn’t going to do anything except make it harder to get the words out. “My mom had a drinking problem when I was a kid. And a problem with latching onto any man who bothered to stick around.”

He opened his mouth, then closed it, most likely remembering when I’d told him about growing up around people who abused alcohol. “Were any of these men… Did they hurt you?” he asked.

I shook my head. “They mostly ignored me or acted like it was some big sacrifice for them to put up with me. I spent most of my time hiding from them and trying to be invisible.”

“That’s… I’m so sorry, Zander. No kid should ever go through that.”

I shrugged, my eyes still on the ground. “A lot of kids go through worse.”

“That doesn’t make your experience any less. I don’t believe in the oppression Olympics. What happens in your life and how it affects you has nothing to do with anyone else. You’re allowed to be angry or upset or hurt or however you feel about it.”

A sardonic smile tugged at my lips. “Ivy has been telling me that for years. Maybe one day I’ll finally get it through my head.”

“Ivy?” Luka asked, his tone even and careful, like he was trying to not sound interested.

“My best friend.” I paused. Might as well tell him the truth. Well, most of the truth. “And my ex-wife.”

“Your ex-wife used to be your best friend?” He tilted his head to the side, his expression confused and strangely adorable.

“Yes, and she still is.”

His jaw dropped. “You’re best friends with your ex-wife?”

I chuckled at his gobsmacked expression. “Yes.”

“How does that even work? The divorced people I know hate their exes. Like,haaaaaatethem.”

“Ivy and I didn’t break up because we stopped loving each other. We just realized that we only loved each other and weren’tinlove.”

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