Page 22 of Playoff

“Oh.” Donnie almost looks disappointed. “I heard it was more recent.”

“Don’t believe everything you hear,” Rowan responds, her eyes drifting to mine again, and there’s no mistaking the annoyance in hers.

Then she turns back to Bristol and they’re talking quietly, so I have no idea how mad she is. She handled it like it was no big deal, so conversation has moved to other topics, but I still feel bad.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

One minute I can’t wait to get away from her, the next I just want to smooth things over.

Being around her is like being in a constant state of emotional whiplash, and that’s probably my fault.

It wasn’t like that in high school.

She was sweet.

Funny.

Helpful.

We could talk for hours.

Except… was she really just humoring me back then? Listening to me talk about hockey because she wanted to make me happy?

That bums me out.

My memories of those times are all wonderful.

Even that awkward-as-hell first time we made love.

I still jerk off thinking about it sometimes, because it was that good. That exciting. She wanted to try everything, long before either of us knew what we were doing.

Had she been faking that too? Just like she faked interest in hockey?

And had I been so self-absorbed that I honestly hadn’t noticed?

I surreptitiously peek over at her and a wave of nostalgia hits me.

She’s laughing, genuinely having a good time talking to Bristol, and I suddenly wish she would laugh like that for me. With me.

I need to apologize and clear the air.

That’s all there is to it.

And then maybe, just maybe, this tightness in my chest every time I’m around her will go away.

SEVEN

Rowan

I leavethe restaurant almost as soon as I’m done eating, and Bristol and I walk back to the hotel.

“You okay?” she asks as we walk. “You were quieter than usual after that whole thing with Blake.”

“It took me a long time to get over him,” I say in frustration. “I’ve finally gotten to a place in life where I don’t think about him for weeks at a time, and now, here he is, not just working and traveling with me, but continually trying to be…friendly! What the fuck? Why is this happening?”

She chuckles. “Sometimes fate can be a real asshole.”

“Tell me about it.”

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