Page 49 of Devoted

I glanced up in surprise to see Micah gesturing at the pen in my hand. I hadn’t even realised I’d been tapping it. I dropped it quickly, slumping down in my chair. I was in the main office with him and Benji, working through yet more paperwork. “Sorry.”

Benji frowned, turning to Micah. “He’s behaving oddly, right?”

“He is,” Micah confirmed, his brow furrowed as he studied me. “There’s definitely something bothering him.”

“I’m right here,” I muttered. Neither of them acknowledged that I’d spoken.

“Phew.” Benji turned back to his screen. “I thought so, but I wanted to check. Ez’s moods are usually easier to read than this.”

“Hmm.” Micah pursed his lips. “You okay finishing this up on your own, Ben?”

“Yup.” He waved vaguely in my direction. “I’ve got this. You go deal with…that.”

“Charming,” I said under my breath as Micah stood up and gestured towards the door with his head. “Eurgh, fine.”

I followed him out into the hallway. Our leader didn’t stop there, walking down the stairs, through the house, and outside into the garden. I realised then that Nox must not have told Micah about our run-in the other day. If he had, this conversation would’ve happened before now.

Tempted as I was to try and avoid this, there was no point. You couldn’t hide anything from Micah. If he wanted to know something from one of us, you could bet we’d tell him. We might fight it, might try to delay it, but the outcome was always the same: Word vomiting all over Micah until you got it all out of your system.

I’d been through this enough times to know what was coming. I wasn’t even upset or irritated by it. I’d opened up to Rami, so what was one more person?

Besides, other than Breann and Grace, Micah was the only one who’d found his mate. He might have some useful advice.

Micah shoved his hands into his pockets, his pace slowing. I fell into step beside him, the two of us silently making our way through the trees.

“So, is this about Sam?”

At least Micah knew a little about what was happening. Hopefully it’d make this easier. “Yes. We’ve been talking.”

As with Rami, I gave Micah a rundown of how we’d got to this place. With everything echoing around in my brain from the night before, I found it strangely easy to open up to him. I covered it all. Our late-night conversations, the need I felt to talk to him, the restlessness I experienced every moment he was out of contact. I held nothing back.

With a sigh, I came to the final most important point. “I’m just…I’m falling for him, Micah, and that fucking terrifies me.”

“Because he might be your mate?”

I shook my head. “No. Because he mightnotbe my mate.”

“Hmm.” Micah stared off into the distance. “I can see why you’re scared. I spent a very long time pining after someone who was never intended to be mine. I wouldn’t wish that heartache on anyone, especially not you.”

My heart plummeted. “So you’re saying I shouldn’t meet him?”

“No,” Micah said slowly, “I’m not saying that. But you’ve said yourself that you’ve felt a pull to him.”

“Not like you did with Nox though. I’ve never felt physically drawn to his location or anything like that. You told me yourself that the two of you found it near impossible to remain apart.”

“True.” Micah’s face took on that slightly glazed expression it always did when he thought about his mate. “But that was only after we’d met. Sure, Nox felt a pull to the surface, but it wasn’t until that day in Hell that he knew what it was.”

“But there’s been no pull for me,” I said hopelessly. “We live in the same city—surely fate would’ve had me stumble across him before now?”

“Firstly, thereisa pull. You’ve said yourself that you feel the need to speak to Sam daily. That there’s an itch under your skin that only retreats once you’ve heard from him.”

“The same could be said about anyone I was interested in.”

Micah’s lips twitched. “Oh, so you’ve felt this way before?”

“No but…” I sighed. “I’m scared to get my hopes up. What if he’s not my mate? Or even worse, what if I then meet my mate but can’t give my heart to them, because it already belongs to Sam?”

Micah put his hand on my shoulder and squeezed. “If he’s not your mate, you do the right thing and walk away. It’s not fair to drag either of you into a relationship that’ll potentially end the instant your mate appears on the scene. Even if it takes decades,you’ll spend the whole time looking over your shoulder, waiting for them to appear.”

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