Page 89 of Conflicted

Even if it felt like it. I’d briefly tasted happiness only to have it taken away again. They said forbidden fruit was the most delicious. That it would tempt you in ways you’d never been tempted before.

They didn’t tell you how much it hurt to have it out of your reach after sampling it.

More than ever, I regretted not keeping my guard up. Not with my emotions, but being aware of where Nox’s hands were. If he hadn’t found my scars, maybe we’d still be in that hotel room, pretending we weren’t doomed, escaping reality with each other for as long as we could. Maybe we could’ve used that time to come up with a solution. A plan that would allow us to be together.

Instead, it’d been a harsh reminder of what we were up against. What we were both risking by doing this.

If it had just been my body on the line, my life, maybe I would’ve pushed harder. But it wasn’t just me, it was my entire unit. I couldn’t risk them, not even for my own happiness. I might’ve been selfish in the past, but that was where I drew the line.

It was alarming to realise that wasn’t what I was most scared of though. No, that fear was reserved for Nox. What they would do to him to punish me.

Nothing would break me faster than seeing Nox in pain.

I’d been stupid to reach out. On reflection, it was a good thing Nox had put me in my place. He was right. It was for the best.

That didn’t mean I’d stopped thinking about himthough. It also hadn’t stopped me reaching for my phone every thirty seconds. About an hour ago, Rami had got annoyed and confiscated it so we could focus on the paperwork that had been dumped on us by upstairs. With the amount we’d been given, I’d had to rope in both him and Grace to help me and Benji out.

Benji had offered me one of his fidget toys, but I’d declined with a tight smile. It wasn’t that I needed something to do with my hands.

I needed something to stop me losing my senses and tracking down my demon.

Not my demon.

To be honest, I was amazed I hadn’t been summoned upstairs after our involvement in the crane disaster. We’d chosen to alter the course of fate, knowing there’d likely be consequences. Well, consequences for me, anyway.

But there’d been nothing aside from an uptick in paperwork. Either they didn’t know about what the Seraphim had done, or thought this was a fitting punishment.

I wouldn’t lie, it was working. Not enough to stop me making the same decision again, but enough to be grumpy about my hand cramping.

We were working our way through a very tedious report about a rise in shifter activity on the Scottish border when Ez burst through the door. As soon as I saw his pale face, I knew something was wrong. He was wearing an expression I’d only seen on him a handful of times before.

Fear.

All my earlier thoughts about Heaven punishing the unit came screaming back to me. Did they know about the humans we’d helped? About the rules we’d broken?

“What’s wrong?” Grace said, dropping her pen. “Ez?”

Ezekiel didn’t acknowledge Grace. It was almost like hehadn’t heard her. His attention was fixed on me as he strode across the room.

I got to my feet as he approached, foreboding spreading through my gut. “What is it?”

Ez tried to speak. It took him three attempts before the words would come out. “It’s Emilio.”

I flinched automatically at the name of my tormentor. I tried to hide it, but from the puzzled stare Benji gave me, I failed. “What about him?”

“He’s dead,” Ez said bluntly. The sense of foreboding descended rapidly into a yawning pit of doom. “Executed. His body has been displayed at one of the portals to Heaven.”

“Displayed?”

Ez inclined his head. “He was hung by his wrists from two trees.”

There was a faint ringing in my ears.No no no.It had to be a coincidence. Nox wouldn’t have been so stupid…

“Tell me everything.”

Ez cleared his throat. “He was tortured before he was killed.”

“How can you tell?” Benji asked curiously. “His wounds would’ve healed, right?”

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