Page 72 of Conflicted

But there was no mistaking it. Fuck.

I loved him.

It was going to ruin everything.

“Nox?” Micah’s hand dropped from my arm, his expression turning cagey. “Are you upset with me for earlier? You have every right to be. I’m sorry that —”

“Don’t.” My voice was guttural as I cut him off. My hands slid onto his shoulders, stopping him from retreating. Even as my whole world was twisting and changing, the one thing I was certain of was keeping him there. With me. “You don’t apologise to me. Ever. I suspect you spend enough time apologising to everyone else; like fuck am I letting you add my name to that list.”

He swayed under my touch before slumping against me. “Everything’s a fucking mess, Nox.”

I wrapped my arms around him, holding him close. “I know, little angel.”

“No, you don’t understand,” he whispered against my neck. “They know. The Seraphim, they know we’re mates.”

I stiffened. “They do?”

“Well, Benji and Ezekiel do. I doubt it’ll be long before the others figure it out.”

The borrowed time we’d been living in was suddenly running short. “What happens now? Are they going to tell the higher-ups?”

“No, they wouldn’t do that.” He swayed in my embrace. “But they’ll find out, Nox. They always do.”

I swallowed hard. There was no way they’d accept this. Us. “We aren’t mated, Micah. We aren’t together.”

He stiffened, pulling out of my arms. He stepped back,folding his arms over his chest. “Of course we aren’t. We hate each other.”

My breath drew in, sharp as a knife. “Do we?”

Micah couldn’t look at me, a muscle jumping in his jaw. “Yes. That’s the way it is. The way it has to be.”

I wanted to grab him and shake him. To insist we could fight against it. That we’d survive whatever they threw at us. But I didn’t. Those weren’t promises I could make. Not when I didn’t know if they were true.

There was also the lingering shadow of Dimitri. Micah hadn’t brought him up again, but the idea that I was his replacement was always there, lurking in the shadows. How could I be with Micah knowing I wasn’t the one he truly wanted?

“Okay, so what do we do now?” If Micah said he couldn’t see me anymore, I was going to have to leave. Fast.

Before my demon could come out and make his feelings known.

Micah rubbed the back of his neck. He looked so fucking vulnerable. I wanted to pull him into my arms again and vow to keep him safe.

“I can’t risk them finding out, Nox. There’d be…consequences. Not just for me, but for the whole unit.”

“What kind of consequences?”

Micah smiled without humour. “The kind I won’t be sharing with you, regardless of how much you push.”

My teeth ground together. “Want to bet?”

His eyes finally met mine and the hollowness there was another stab to my gut. “Please, Nox. I can’t. Can you just trust me on this? It wouldn’t be good, and that’s all I can say about it.”

Fuck, why did he have to plead with me? Didn’t herealise I was only minutes away from throwing myself at his feet and promising him the entire world?

I nodded slowly. “Okay. I won’t push.”

We were silent, the few feet between us feeling like miles. The pull in my chest was almost agonising, like it knew something was coming.

Eventually, I couldn’t stand the silence any longer. “What happens now, Micah? What do you want?”