Page 89 of The Prospect

I thought to myself, how can you miss the mark that badly? Read the signs so wrong that you ultimately end up going in the entirely opposite direction. But now, sitting here, staring off into nothing but the depths of my own self-pity, I’m starting to understand how he felt.

Though, unlike Wilks, I don’t need to sit here and debate my stupidity. The fact that I’ve gone fifteen years without uncovering my best friend's true feelings toward me speaks for itself.

Yet, as I’m faced with the reality I’ve been blind to all these years, I can’t help but wonder: why now?

It’s a simple enough question, am I right? Why, after all this time, has the truth finally decided to make itself known?

I ponder the thought for a moment, though not a single linear answer comes to mind, forcing me to huff out in frustration and toss another rock into the ravine below my feet.

It’s been a repetitious pattern, hoping to come to a conclusion but instead coming up unsuccessful.

I watch carefully as the water splashes up into the air and the stone sinks to the bottom. Yet, once the water settles, the rippling impact lingers until it eventually fades into nothing.

My eyes assess the visual that lies ahead, tilting my head back and forth in thought until finally, as if life is trying to give me the answers I’ve been searching so desperately for, it hits me.

Maybe, regardless of how ridiculous it sounds, I’m the stone and Hazel’s the water. Strange, I know, but what if the splashing up represents the two of us coming into each other’s lives? What if the rippling waves represent the highs and lows of our friendship? How we’ve come so far and never looked back.

But, like the waves, some things can’t last forever. Is that it? Have Hazel and I reached our expiry? Or is it that we need to make a new splash? A new beginning…

Fuck, I can’t tell if I’ve cracked the code here or am searching for answers out of nothing.

I shouldn’t be thinking about the rocks and the water and the waves. I should be thinking about the fact that the girl I'd been searching for all these years had been right in front of me all along.

I don’t think there’s anything else worse than that. Having the answer to every uncertainty stare you in the eyes and not once had you even considered it to be a possibility.

That thought alone absolutely kills me.

From the moment Hazel and I first met, it was as if everyone around us had this greater prophecy for our relationship. That no matter our objections, we were more than just best friends. Has everyone seen what I’d been blind to for so long?

“I hate to say that I always had a feeling, Daniel.” The pained smile on Amira’s face as she released my hand and peered into my eyes told me everything I needed to know. “You and Hazel…” She swallowed before she continued.“There’s always been something special between you two, despite yourobjections,”she admitted.“I guess it was my own fault for not realizing it sooner.”

“None of this is your fault…”I attempted to mitigate the colossal mess I’d managed to land myself in when Amira asked, “Do you have feelings for her, too?”And rather than a response, I’d chosen to remain silent.

They say sometimes silence is the best answer. The sheer sound of nothing can almost speak for itself, and in this instance, it did.

“You know what, Green,”Amira spoke so quietly that no one else could hear her.“I think I’m going to go.”

“Amira, stop. Please. Let me explain.”I tried to lower my voice as I followed her out of the house.“I…I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I swear!”

“I know you didn’t, Daniel.”She was willing enough to give me that as she sighed in defeat, halting in place.“But if I’m being honest, the whole time I’ve been trying to fall for you, you’ve been falling for someone else right in front of my eyes. And the worst part, I don’t even think you realize just how in love with Hazel you really are…”

I didn’t know what to say. The truth felt like a knife stabbing me in the chest, but with the pain somehow came this unknowing sense of relief…pleasure.

It was as if all of a sudden, whether I realized it or not, with Amira’s confession, I didn’t have to hold back anymore.

“What is it, huh? Spit it out because I’m tired of this. Just be honest with me. Why are you acting this way?!”

Hazel’s question propelled through my mind in that moment, the moment before Amira opened up her car door and I prompted her to stop once more.

“Amira…please,”I pleaded, but truthfully, I didn’t know what exactly I was pleading for. I just knew that I felt awful—terrible, but seeing her so at peace with all of this made it that much worse.

“Hazel’s the one for you, Green,”she told me something I'd always known, perhaps all along.“And the sooner you come to terms with that…” Her deep eyes peered down at the pavement before she pulled them back up.“The happier the both of you will be.”

“DANIEL!” Her voice could be drowning in a sea of people, and somehow, I’d still be able to hear her. “Green!” she shouts once more, and through the moonlight that cascades along the field, that’s when I see her—Hazel, paving her way through the dark and toward the bridge.

“Hazel?” I don’t know why I say her name with a sense of uncertainty. I know, without a doubt, it’s her. “What…what are you doing out here?”

I quickly remove myself from the ledge, my legs guiding me to meet her as she sprints her way in front of me.