Page 123 of Destined To Fall

Slowly, I open my eyes and find Jeremy hovering above me. He’s pale, with days’worth of stubble shadowing his jaw. It looks like he hasn’t slept in a week.

“Hi,” I rasp, giving him a small smile.

“Hi.” He releases a breath like he’s been holding it for hours and passes me a glass of water and some pills.“For pain,” he says simply. I swallow them down, though it’s not easy.“Do you need the bathroom?”

I shake my head and try to speak, but nothing comes out. I groan, desperately trying to clear my throat,to no avail.

“You’ll do more damage—” At the look on my face, Jeremy shuts up, a lopsided grin curving his mouth.“So stubborn. It’s good to see. You gave me the fright of my life, Viv. I honest to god thought you were dying.”

I don’t want to think about that too closely.“—sorry. Shouldn’t.” I groan again and finish the water, willing my damn body to work.“Shouldn’thave…shown up here…not after…everything.” Iforcethe words out, still sounding like an old man.

“Why did you?”

His question catches me off guard. There’s no heat in it, no anger, only plain curiosity.

“I…I don’t know.” He sees the lie before I even realize I spoke one, and the truth hits me like a sledgehammer.“The cabbie asked where…yours was the first place, the first face…I thought of.” My voice cracks painfully throughout, and my eyes blur.“I guess I didn’t want to be alone.”

“Vivienne.”

I’m so stupid and selfish. And weak. I turn my head away from him, desperate to hide my shame.

“Look at me. Please.”

My body struggles to obey, taking all the strength I have to shift, avoiding eye contact with Jeremy like the chicken I am. I can’t look at him. I’ll break.“I shouldn’t—be here.”

“Well, you’re here now.”

“This isn’t…fair to you. I’m being selfish…as always. I wasn’t thinking.”

“Vivienne, I don’t want you to leave. If you do, I’m just going to follow you. Besides, you don’t look like you’re in any state to go anywhere.” He tries to make light, but I can hear the concern. It runs deep.

“I’ll be fine.”

He takes my chin gently in his hand, forcing me to look at him.

“Please. Stay. Let me take care of you.”

“I don’t deserve it.”I don’t deserve you.

He smiles, the lopsided one that makes my heart skip a beat, and I’m struck again by how handsome I find his face. So lovely, so open, so…pure.

The dam cracks, and a few stray tears fall. A silent stream down my face, one after the other, catching on Jeremy’s fingers. His crooked grin slips to a small, sad one as he wipes the remaining tears away with his thumb. I will never be good enough for this boy. He deserves so much more than me, but I don’t know how to quit him. I don’t know how to give him up.

Releasing my face, Jeremy shoots in beside me, scoops me up and into his arms with a gentleness that surprises me, and cradles me against his chest.

“Please don’t cry. Stay so I can take care of you.”

“But—”

“I know.”

“I owe—”

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not. It’s so not okay. And I can’t—”

“I called my dad.” I vaguely remember asking Jeremy to call him. All the same, I still, my heart rate kicking up a notch.Please say he’s okay.“I’ve never heard him so…emotional.”

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