Page 26 of Chasing Amber

“Okay. I don’t think there’s any reason to cancel. It won’t be a long meeting. I just need to discuss what I’ll be showcasing at the exhibition next month. I doubt many people will be in the gallery. I’m sure I’ll be fine. I’m tired, but I think it’s from the stress of the day more than anything.”

The stress has nothing to do with the cut on my chin. It’s from me letting myself try on a new persona and getting lost in it. It’s from me panicking about how it made me feel, how Isaac made me feel—how Isaaccontinuesto make me feel.

I wonder if he knows that I’m squeezing my legs together because he has me so on edge I can’t think straight. Surely not. It’s been so long since I’ve had an orgasm that I’m strung tight like a top. The tight skinny jeans aren’t helping. Nor is the lace bra that’s pushing my breasts up.

Isaac nods. “You let me know if you change your mind. I’ll make excuses for you.”

“Thank you.” Has he always been this kind? Calling Monette to make excuses for me is not part of his job description. He’s my bodyguard. His job is to keep me safe.

As I continue eating, I think back over the weeks and months. Isaac does a lot of things for me. He’s gradually taken over the tasks I dislike. He’s become my personal assistant in many ways. He cooks for me, manages the household chores, and reminds me of my schedule each day. When did he become more like an assistant than a random protection detail?

When we’re finished eating, I know I need to escape before the room explodes from all the tension. “I think I’m going to shower and go to bed. I have a headache.”

“Okay, baby. Jace gave me some waterproof bandages so you could shower without getting the cut wet. I’ll put one on for you to be sure you get it covered. You won’t be able to see the injury as well as me.”

“Okay.”

He stands and takes several dishes to the sink. When I rise and start to help him, he sets a hand on my back. “I’ve got it, baby.”

Every time he says that one word, it burrows deeper and deeper under my skin. It’s starting to sound like our normal when it’s definitely not.

After he’s loaded the dishwasher, he grabs a bottle of painkillers from the cabinet and shakes two into his palm. He brings them to me and hands me a glass of water. “Take these, baby. For your headache.”

I pop them in my mouth and swallow them with the water.

“Good girl,” he says as he turns back to the cabinet.

I stare at his back. My heart… It’s going to crack in half if he ever stops calling me that. I’m not at all sure this thing between us is a good idea. It’s probably not. Above all else, he’s the best bodyguard I’ve ever had. I wouldn’t want to fuck that up and lose him. I’m used to him. Comfortable. There’s no way I would let another man move into my apartment.

His hand comes to the back of my neck, startling me out of my worries. “Let’s go in your bathroom where the lighting is good, and I’ll put the bandage on.”

My fists clench and unclench at my sides as I let him guide me through my bedroom and into my bathroom. How many times has he been in here now? Four? Five? One of those times, he stretched out on my bed and nestled against me.

Isaac points to the toilet seat. “Sit. Tip your head back for me.”

He pulls a bandage out of his pocket, opens it, and sets it on the counter before holding my head with one hand and easing the tape that holds up a square of gauze from my face.

I wince from the pull of the tape.

“I’m sorry, baby. Almost done.” He grabs the waterproof bandage, peels off the back, and carefully lines it up with my cut. “There. Perfect.”

I lower my head and look at him. Fuck, this is awkward. Will he leave now?

His hand comes to the back of my neck, and he strokes my cheek with his thumb. “Be careful in the shower. Shout if you need me. I’ll come check on you after you get settled in bed.”

He’s not asking. He’s telling me what’s going to happen. He’s letting me know he’ll be back in my bedroom. What kind of willpower will I have then? I’ll have on less clothing. I’ll be more vulnerable. How long can I hold my flimsy shield in place?

CHAPTER 10

Amber

I stare at the bathroom door for long seconds after Isaac leaves the room. I feel lonely. I find myself wishing he would have stayed. I’ve been using the bathroom alone for most of my life. It’s madness that I suddenly feel like I want Isaac with me.

I almost told him I didn’t think I could shower alone, but that would have been going way too far. As I peel my shirt over my head, I shudder at the memory of Isaac putting it on me earlier. When I rock my hips back and forth to get my skinny jeans off, I’m reminded of the chuckle we shared when he pulled these up my body.

Isaac saw me in my bra and panties today. He was a total gentleman, but that almost made it weirder. I stare at myself in the full-length mirror on the back of my bathroom door. I trail a finger down between my breasts and then cup them through the bra.

It’s been a long time since I’ve let myself be sexual. I sometimes have fleeting thoughts about Isaac, but I rarely letthem develop into more because the idea has always scared me to death.

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