Page 60 of Sweet Surrender

She hadn’t known the boys that long, but in her heart, she still couldn’t accept that Nick had been cheating. Even though she had to admit that there didn’t seem to be another explanation.

Even his father agrees that he was cheating,she told herself firmly, and not for the first time.You don’t know him better than his father knows him.

But the whisper of doubt in the back of her mind still wouldn’t stop.

“You okay?” Angela asked her quietly.

She looked up and saw that everyone else had gotten into their places to begin singing.

“Sorry,” she muttered, feeling more embarrassed than before as she scurried over to her spot.

Madge lifted her hands to cue the choir. As the beautiful opening notes of “The First Noel” drifted over the park, everything grew still and quiet, and the sweet peace of the song and its message lifted Becca’s worried soul.

Her voice was only part of a larger chorus, and her role was merely to do her very best to support the whole. A wave of comfort instantly filled her chest. It was the same feeling she’d had the summer her father had piled all the kids in the old blue van and taken them to the beach. The water of the Atlantic was somehow still as cold as ice, even in June. But Becca had never seen the ocean before, and standing in the wet sand, looking out over the vastness of the waves under a swirling gray sky, she’d had this same sense of being tiny in the face of the majesty of nature and the mystery of the universe.

As the song continued, she gazed out onto the crowd. Somehow, her eyes instantly landed on Zane and his boys.

How can I feel this way after only two weeks? Like an invisible string is tying my heart to theirs?

She tore her eyes away, focusing instead on the music. When they reached the final song, the whole choir walked over to the tree for the lighting. And as the last notes faded into the chill night air, the mayor of the tiny town stepped forward and spoke into the microphone, his voice echoing over the hushed crowd.

“As you know, we have a tradition in Sugarville Grove to honor a member of the community that’s gone above and beyond to contribute to the well-being of others. This year we wanted to honor Luke Hayes.”

There was a round of applause, and then he continued.

“For those of you who don’t know, Luke spends many afternoons every year delivering trees to those who can’t make it out themselves to do so. Now, I for one, don’t know how that old truck keeps running, but it sure does. And Luke Hayes puts it to good use. To thank him for his generous spirit, he and his family are going to light the tree this year. Thank you, Luke, for being our Christmas Star this year.”

A man she didn’t know joined the mayor, along with his wife and three children. Becca couldn’t help but notice how happy they all seemed, and wondered if she would ever find someone who looked at her the way Luke was looking at his family.

What if I already have, and I’m just too blind to see it?

The excitement grew as the crowd counted down, and then the sweet family on the stage did the honors. When the lights flashed to life, illuminating the massive tree and its old-fashioned decorations, Becca sighed along with the rest of the crowd.

Then, the choir joined the rest of the town in dropping gifts under the tree for families who were struggling this year. Becca was grateful that Madge had pulled her aside to explain and let her know how to adopt a family or a child.

Becca didn’t have much herself this year, but she didn’t need much, and she certainly didn’t mind economizing a little extra in order to have the pleasure of buying for an anonymous child. She focused on her gifts as she walked up to the tree to deposit them, trying not to think about the eyes of the townsfolk on her, and whether or not word had gotten out yet about how bad of a teacher she was.

But no one seemed to be paying much attention to her. They were all too caught up in the festivities.

“Come on,” Allie told her when the whole ceremony was over. “We’re going to grab some pizza.My treat.”

Becca felt her cheeks heat at the indication that the other woman had guessed the real reason she never went out.

“It’s okay,” she said quickly. “I can pay for it.”

“Not a chance,” Allie laughed. “Remember, I’ve had my job a year longer than you and I don’t even pay rent since I still live on the farm with my family. Besides, I owe you one.”

“Why?” Becca asked.

“Because you pulled my nephew out of his shell a little,” Allie said, nodding toward the southwest corner of the park, where Cal was running around with another boy. And this time, Nick wasn’t with him.

But Becca’s joy was short-lived because when she finally spotted Nick, he was practically clinging to his dad, probably still feeling ashamed about the math test.

“I’m pretty sure I made things much worse than they were before,” she admitted out loud.

“Nah,” Allie said. “It’s good to shake things up sometimes, even if they don’t land where you hoped. Come on, let’s get some food. It’s cold out here, and I’m so hungry, I could eat a woodchuck.”

“Thanks,” she told her, meaning it. Allie’s words made Becca think that maybe she really was just getting too far into her own head about the whole thing. It wouldn’t be the first time.

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