Page 85 of The Killer Who Kept Me

He plopped onto the mattress, and I turned to Em. “Do you want to say anything to anyone?”

Em swallowed loudly and stood. First he walked to Shyla. She was still crying, but she lifted her head as he approached.

“Why’d you keep me if you never wanted me?”

She sniffled. She had one arm free, so she wiped her nose with it. “I did want you. I tried.”

“When did you try? As far back as I can remember, you were never a mother. It wasn’t until Saros told me you were that I even knew, that’s how unmotherly you were. You only cared about the drugs, and Ramsey gave those to you, so you let him hurt me so he’d never take them from you.”

She wailed so loudly, it took a moment before Em could continue. “You’re not a mother, you’re barely a person. You’re an animal. I won’t think of you after today, and I don’t know what happens here—that’s Saros’s choice, but what’s strange is, I don’t care.” He turned away from her and walked to RJ.

“You were the son he always wanted, and you were well on your way to becoming just like him. I don’t think it matters that we share DNA, I don’t think it ever would have changed how you treated me, but I’ll never know.”

“I’m sorry, Em.” RJ spoke so softly, as if it were only for Em to hear, but I did.

“I don’t know if I believe you.” Em went to lift his hand, maybe to touch RJ’s, but he dropped it and moved to Ramsey.

“You made every second of my life horrible. A living nightmare. I didn’t question if you hated me, I knew. You made it clear every day. Every bruise, break, punishment, I felt just how much you despised that I breathed. I would pray at night that you’d die, that maybe if you did I’d be able to break free.”

“So you run from me to this monster?” he asked. Cos went to approach, but Em held up his hand.

“Saros is the killer who kept me, who loves me, who makes me feel safe for the first time in my life. While I prayed for your death, I prayed for his embrace.” He shrugged. “Seems like I’ll be getting both of those prayers answered.”

He spun on his heel over to me. “I’m gonna go upstairs now, if that’s okay?”

I leaned down and kissed him. I hoped he understood how proud I was of him, how much I did, in fact, love him.

“Okay.”

After he was gone, I approached Ramsey. “There were a few more bruises on him than the last time I saw him. Let’s even things out, shall we?” I spent the next twenty minutes making Ramsey feel every minute of the pain he’d inflicted on Em.

When I left to go upstairs to talk with the governor, he was passed out. Shyla was detoxing so badly I wasn’t sure she’d even last the rest of the day, and RJ hadn’t said a word. He simply sat on the mattress with a lost look on his face.

I had to talk with the governor before this was all put to rest. So I left the little family and made my way upstairs to clean up and talk to him.

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

“The things we fear the most have already happened to us.”

~ Robin Williams

Em

I didn’t feelanything when I went back upstairs. I saw Dafni, who apologized and hugged me, and I was once again amazed how someone who didn’t have the same blood running through my veins cared more than the ones who did.

Maeve hugged me too and wouldn’t leave my side for a while. Eventually, fresh-baked cookies and ice cream won out.

“You must be Em.” I looked up from my spot on the couch at a familiar face.

“Governor Hopper.” I stood.

“Please call me Eugene.” He held out his hand which I shook. “My son tells me you kept him sane and that you took the brunt of everything down there.” His eyes danced across my face, likely cataloging my injuries.

“I’m just really glad Andre is okay.”

“He is, thanks to you and Saros.”

I waved him off. “I didn’t do anything.”

---